The Needle's Bewitching Eye

More Empty Spaces

2009-01-22T22:20:00.006-06:00

Give Clue snuggles from me, peach ... and don't forget to visit.

Chess
March 1995 - January 14, 2009

Muttering, Mumbling, and Probably Meandering

2007-10-30T19:58:00.009-05:00

Here is week 247:

Inaugural :: Ball

Pledge :: Vow

String :: Can I stitch with it?

Trot :: Gallop

Fitness :: Out of ...

Cinder :: Block like the one which fell on my toe -- how can something nearly hollow be that heavy?

Edge :: U2

31 :: a prime number, 32

Blue :: smurfs

Leather :: Tori Amos

In other news ... I brought DH home from the hospital a week ago yesterday, and he returned to work the following Tuesday. He was actually an in-patient for a full week! That never happens anymore, what with insurance companies kicking people out ten minutes after open heart surgery, so you know this was -- and unfortunately still is -- a serious situation. We still have no real answers regarding why the original clot formed in his leg (except it's not due to lymphoma), and we're just lucky that when it broke into multiple clots and went to his lungs, they didn't kill him.

Right now, I'm most concerned that his anticoagulation numbers aren't where the doctors want them to be. I don't know what all of this means exactly, but here's what our doctor has told us: DH is at 1.2 (and has been consistently at 1.2 for at least a week now), but they want him above 2 and well below 7. At 7 or higher, he would have to return to in-patient status immediately, as he could bleed to death internally. However, until he's above 2, the blood clots are still a risk -- which makes me ask what I think is the rather obvious: Why did they release him in the first place? He was released with a prescription for Lovenox -- which I have to administer to him by injection (technically, he could administer this, but it STINGS for 15 minutes after it's injected, requires two injections in order to get his full dose, and the stinging starts within about 30 seconds after injection ... so it works better if I do it, primarily because he's still very afraid of needles). He's on a huge dose of this medication twice per day -- and has been for nearly two full weeks now, and yet, his numbers just aren't moving. At the same time, he's also been taking Coumadin by mouth -- since day one in the hospital and in increasing doses ... I'm pretty sure the reason things aren't happening any faster is because DH is 6'6" and just under 300 pounds, but at the same time, they don't want to make any drastic or sudden changes in his medication regimen because they don't want to get anywhere near that dangerous number 7.

But it certainly is FRUSTRATING for both of us. Those Lovenox shots hurt so bad he's in tears just thinking about getting the shot, and I'm only able to hold back because I need to see straight in order to stick him. It breaks my heart that to help him -- allegedly, at least at this point, because I'm certainly not convinced -- I have to cause him so much obvious physical pain. And oh my God, the bruises! Pretty much his entire front waistline for about four inches in width is this horrible purply blue bruise -- the color a bruise is when it's freshest, at its most painful, and from the most serious type of injury (like a car accident). This bruising is from his belt (no, I'm not kidding), so tomorrow he's picking up some suspenders. On the other hand, the bruising does indicate that his blood is getting thinner than normal -- and that is what we want.

As far as the diabetes, he was sent home with no insulin in any form to manage it. WTF??? I'm not sure how much my DH isn't telling me, or isn't telling me accurately. It certainly sounds crazy to release a diabetic without prescribing him any insulin after a week-long stay in the hospital during which he was on a diabetic diet and ON INSULIN ... but, as I've mentioned several times before, the medical community in this area of the country appears to be made up primarily of those who barely didn't flunk out of medical school (scroll past this post, please; it will come up first in the list).

I couldn't be at the hospital all the time, and unfortunately, I mostly managed to miss all the doctors myself, so right now I'm stuck relying on DH's word for things. I will feel more comfortable after going with him to an appointment or two with several of the doctors who were involved in his care ... but the fact is he absolutely WAS released from the hospital without insulin or a prescription for insulin.

So anyway, according to DH, our primary care doctor still thinks the diabetes is just stress related. The problem with that method of defense is that it would be extremely difficult to describe the entirety of the time I've known DH as anything other than not just stressful, but stress-FILLED. Treating him under the assumption he will stop being diabetic once he stops being stressed out is, thus, most likely an exercise in futility. Additionally, the endocrinologist did a special test able to somehow look back three months in time ~~~woohoo time travel ~~~ and Todd's numbers indicated he was diabetic then, too. There's no question he was also stressed then ... which is basically my point.

DH's initial plan upon returning home was to eat as few carbohydrates as possible -- none if he could manage to avoid them altogether. I just don't think this approach is very healthy ... and to be very blunt, DH was much more tolerable a person to be around when he was on insulin in the hospital.

He was given a small supply of insulin (after we insisted on it), but no prescription for it, by our doctor during his first appointment after returning home, and although it appears he doesn't need very much of it, he does benefit from small but regular doses. His ability to control his anger (or have none at all to begin with!) increases dramatically with the addition of insulin to his diet.

Meanwhile, I managed to make myself briefly sick, too. Wanting to show encouragement to DH by taking a few shots of my own, I decided it was time for the pneumonia vaccine as well as this year's flu vaccine. Because of my fibromyalgia-compromised immune system, I was very nervous about the pneumonia vaccine, which is allegedly good for life, but it went fine, and I have not experienced any symptoms from it. On the other hand, I started experiencing flu symptoms right on schedule for me -- late the next day, or so -- but didn't recognize them for what they were until all heck broke loose (oh ... sorry ... TMI) three mornings later. I'm feeling better now, although my stomach is still a little iffy. This is the first flu vaccine in about five years which I recommend you be sure to get -- ASAP in fact, as I hear it is already making the rounds -- because you DEFINITELY don't want the full blown version of THIS!

Other than that, I'm just hoping we manage to make it financially through the next two weeks. I had everything planned fairly well to fit our extremely tight budget before DH had to go into the hospital ... The biggest wrench is the Lovenox -- which is expensive.

That combined with the fact that a friend of mine -- well, ex-friend, I guess, since she can't be bothered to return calls, emails, IMs, snail mails, or anything else -- hasn't repaid a loan that would just about cover the Lovenox. It's my fault, though.

I knew her to be unreliable about returning things -- she had something of mine for well over six years because she kept misplacing it and then every time she found it, she was too stingy and/or disorganized to bother putting it in the mail to me. (This always really hurt my feelings because she was mailing packages of all kinds of things off to other people all the time -- so it's not like she didn't have the time, the funds, the packing materials, the know-how, etc. to mail me MY package of stuff. Rather, she just didn't have the inclination. She used to say it was to make sure I would visit her again, but I visited several times during the six years she had my stuff ... and those were the times when my stuff always *POOF* disappeared ... nowhere to be found.)

Obviously then, I should have known better when visited her for what I now know was the last time that agreeing to buy things for her (under the agreement she would pay me back at the beginning of the following month by PayPal) was a mistake.

I was very specific about the PayPal portion of the repayment agreement. I don't take checks; PayPal is more useful, more trustworthy, much faster, etc. (Also, she'd griped to me many times about the bad checks she'd written -- with her complaint being that the bank honored them, then expected her to pay for both the checks and the overdraft fees, and what was she -- a woman on a fixed disability income where there's so little spending flexibility -- supposed to do now? I listened to her so many times, always trying not to roll my eyes, sometimes suggesting she turn off her overdraft protection with her bank, and thinking to myself that she should stop writing bad checks -- or stop spending the money she'd already written the check for on other stuff. Don't get me wrong: I DO understand that sometimes things happen; for instance, occasionally, a person writes a check with every intention of it being a good check, but then a medical emergency comes up. The gods know, this kind of thing has happened to me/us once or twice -- and I've always made good on the checks [if I couldn't hold them up from being cashed in the first place, which I always tried to do first, and which was successful about 50% of the time -- saving me the cost of the overdraft fees, and actually earning me respect in the eyes of the check recipient] -- with a money order, not another check [another check would have been an insult to someone to whom I'd already, even unintentionally, written a bad check]. Problems just came up way too often with her checks, in my opinion. Also in my opinion, she didn't do the right thing about remedying the problems. I've since actually come to the conclusion he's probably suffering from early onset Alzheimers -- which my maternal grandmother suffered from, and so I saw firsthand the challenges this can cause and the damage it can do -- and it's my greatest personal fear as far as my own future. Anyway, in the case of this ex-friend, Alzheimers would explain away not only so much of her "irrational" financial behavior and other difficulties caring for herself, but it would also explain so much of what I can only describe as an increasingly cruel pattern of behavior toward me which eventually devastated our friendship.) Anyway, I had good reason to require a PayPal payment, especially from her. (It would be unfair not to note that she did send me a check -- or I assume it was a check; I didn't open it before returning it to her with a note on the outside reminding her I don't accept checks and to use PayPal.) When I didn't hear anything from her, I sent her a PayPal invoice, which of course, makes things as easy as pie on her. I've since sent her two PayPal reminders also. It's ridiculous! Basically, she's just a thief at this point, and I'm just a schmuck whom she managed to rip off one final time.

More Muttering

2007-10-21T03:31:00.000-05:00

This is week 246:

Las Vegas :: Cyndi Toth (Cynthia Ann Toth) PLEASE contact me !!!

Linus :: Snoopy, Sloopy, Loopy, Clue

Struck :: Moon

Movie :: Keeping the Faith

Anxious :: DH

Bandit :: Raccoon

Picks :: Sticks

Lasso :: Loop, Loopy, Clue

Dinner :: not hungry

Bargain :: Bin

This is Nuts!

2007-10-14T09:40:00.000-05:00

Okay ... I know the stereotype: women are supposed to love shoes. Most women I know have, at some point in their lives, loved shoes, even if they do not now love shoes. At one time, I had a moderate love for shoes myself. However, after having a bunionectomy on one foot, my love for shoes changed more into a like for shoes. Then when I broke my other ankle, I really lost my love for shoes. Even more importantly, now that I've learned just how damaged my back is and know exactly how much high heels contribute to screwing up the female body's spinal alignment (all to make us women look sexy for men, so cleverly using such a delicious looking tool of torture that we often willingly go ahead and do it to ourselves!), I make my shoe choices much more carefully and with entirely different goals in mind. Today, it's all about comfort for me.

Don't get me wrong, though. A pretty pair of shoes can still turn my head, even now. Usually I end up thinking of how it will hurt me in some way, but that's beside the point. I do like my comfortable shoes to look nice, and whenever I find a shoe that looks particularly attractive and is also comfortable, I've been known to buy the same shoe in more than one color ... or an extra pair or two in the same pair as backups for when I wear out the first pair. I do that especially because I wear an odd size which is difficult to find in the first place.

Anyway, my love for shoes clearly was never anything like that of Carrie Bradshaw of Sex in the City who, in one episode, counted up all her shoes, did the math, and realized she could have bought a home -- in New York City, no less -- if she hadn't spent all her money on shoes! I never loved shoes THAT much, and I'm pretty sure I've never known anyone who's loved shoes that much. I also never had a love for the type of shoes Carrie loved -- I mean, some of her shoes were really pretty weird! (But then, so were quite a lot of her entire outfits ... ) Most heels hurt after about ten minutes -- or less, so I never got into them at all -- especially heels over a maximum of 2 inches. Teeter tottering around like Carrie Bradshaw looks totally ridiculous, and I had a job where I needed credibility. Actually, to put it bluntly, I prefer not to teeter totter at all.

Anyway, lately there's been this big thing for Dr. Scholl's shoes -- just the plain old standard Dr. Scholl's sandal I remember my mother liking when I was a little girl in the 1970s -- but the big thing about them now is that the wooden base is painted. It's such a big thing now that it even made the Martha Stewart show; she was showing people how to paint their own. Depending on where you are shopping (online offers the most options), you can buy them in all different patterns and colors -- stripes, dots, and so on. Some of them really are pretty cute, although it seems kind of weird to me that people really want a pair of shoes where the part you step on is painted -- so it's not even seen all that well while you're wearing it. But that's one of those things about fads ... they're always a bit silly.

Here's a cute pair you can pick up for the minimal cost of just $129.99. Wait -- $129.99? For a pair of Dr. Scholl's? Over $100? These are EXACTLY the same shoes my mother used to pick up at Walgreens, of all places, and probably for less than $20 way back then. The only difference is that this cute pair has been painted a lovely shade of sky blue, and then has white polkadots painted on top of that. So the paint job is worth $95? Oh, wait, sorry ... the paint was administered by an artist named Marie Hejl. Well, sorry, but if Picasso wanted to paint my shoes before I bought them, I still don't think I'd give him an extra $95 for doing it. (Maybe Dali.) Look, down there in the left hand corner of THIS PAGE, and it says, "May We Suggest" followed by a picture of a regular, unpainted pair of Dr. Scholl's shoes for just $34.99! Yet people are still willing to pay this kind of money for these -- or these, which I don't think are anywhere near as cute, myself.

Now, even if you are NOT artistically inclined, as I definitely am NOT, you can still buy some of the regular Dr. Scholl's, buy some paint (inexpensively), and paint the shoes yourself. A few stencils later, and you can have almost any of these painted shoes for no more than half the price they are selling for.

Heck, at that point, you can start taking orders from your friends, and charging $100. You'll make a nice profit and it will still save your friends a hefty chunk of change.

Try selling a pair on eBay -- who knows where you can go from there?

There's nothing wrong with this idea, either. After all, as I mentioned, Martha Stewart had a segment on her show about this. If Martha can do it, then you can, too! Or at least, I think that's pretty much her motto. Nothing she does is too terribly difficult -- or it's never seemed that way the fairly numerous amount of times I've caught her show. Sure, sometimes it's a bit time consuming to do ... or things LOOK difficult ... but what Martha shows you is that the things that look difficult and expensive and oh-so-chic really are not so much trouble to do yourself if you have just a little bit of time and a little bit of interest.

Give it a try ... buy a regular pair of Dr. Scholl's in your size, and go to town!

Or just buy a regular pair of Dr. Scholl's if you want a pair, skip the fad, and get back to stitching -- which is what I'm going to do. I always wanted a pair of those shoes because my mother liked them so much ... Now maybe I can find out why she liked them so much -- for $34.99, LOL.

Two Weeks for the Post of One

2007-10-14T07:46:00.000-05:00

This is week 244:

Cluster :: What a bunch of women do when they are talking about someone
Announcement :: News
Respect :: Lacking
Incident :: a situation which has as much chance to end up on a police report or as some other part of your permanent record, as it does to become one of those stories you won't tell your kids (or the children of anyone else in your generation for whom you are supposed to be setting a good example) -- at least not until those kids are grown-ups with kids themselves
Accordion :: an instrument rarely seen played which looks both silly and interesting ... and which you kind of want to try playing but for some reason you aren't entirely sure of, would not actually want anyone to see you trying to play
Drunk :: Frat boys
If :: only, which are the first two words of the most common phrase I heard growing up: "If only you'd never been born, ... " Like I somehow had any choice or blame in the matter.
Dexter :: Shoe (I haven't seen the TV show because we don't have that channel ... Should I? Would it make me feel better about myself or my life to see a show about a "nice" serial killer? Can I sic him on certain people?)
Wedding :: An event which is supposed to be special and about the bride and the groom, but almost always ends up being about everyone else and anything but special. It will be unforgettable, though.
Gambling :: I probably could have said Gambling after Wedding instead of what I did, but without saying what I did, you wouldn't have understood why I could have said Gambling. :)

Here, in a more timely fashion (It's difficult to keep on track when you have an improperly sealed lumbar puncture causing all kinds of wacky symptoms for you ... then add your MIL having an angioplasty followed by open heart surgery to confuse the days even more, especially when you're not done grieving over your FIL's untimely death, and it's amazing anything at all happens anywhere near on time anymore!), is Week 245:

Illicit :: Insurance (I guess because of the way they tend to do anything they can to NOT pay out when any reasonable person would agree that they should.)
Go :: Green
Jacket :: Spring
Blow :: Wind
Coach :: Baseball
Effort :: Work, Try, Attempt
Leadership :: Something sorely missing from the current US Republican administration (And please remember, Zooomabooma, that this is MY free association, not yours. Obviously, since we have different political opinions about this current administration, if our free associations lead us to think of this political administration, entirely different words will lead us there, or the same word will lead us to say entirely different things. Since this is free association, by definition, it's pretty useless to argue about it.)
Snore :: DH !!!!!
Fearless :: Strawberries (it's because of the movie, Fearless, which is one of my favorites)
Network :: Why, the Independent Fiber Network, of course!

An Unexpected Gift

2007-10-02T22:48:00.000-05:00

Karen Pierce, with whom I have not gotten along, wrote this as a comment to one of my recent posts:

Very sad. I have such a distrust and dislike for the medical field. We're at their mercy, and more and more it's becoming clear that there are a lot of "medical professionals" who should not be trusted with our care.

My sympathies to your family, Heather.

Her note is lovely, and although I wanted to write her to say so for days, I just couldn't take her sympathy note with the sincerity it was intended because of the history between us.

And that was sad -- really sad. Because maybe Karen was truly affected by what I wrote about how horribly unnecessary, undignified, and inhumane Dad's death was. It was a death which simply should not have happened -- not then, and certainly not that way, that is. Maybe Karen's sympathy note was for real -- an honest expression I could trust. Maybe she was reaching out to me, for the first time, in kindness, which would be a good thing I should encourage. Maybe it was a moment which could have turned our "relationship," (for lack of a better word) around, and yet, I was ... afraid. My thickened skin didn't trust her, or the way she reached out, or what her motives might be.

I kept thinking about these things. Was I being fair to Karen? Was I being fair to me? I wasn't sure. I did realize her words touched me enough to wish I felt safe putting faith in them.

So, I wrote this post, and although she was much the focus, it wasn't just about Karen because there are a lot of other people out there in the online needlework world tossing around cruel words without a second thought whom I hoped to at least encourage to have a second thought the next time they do something like this -- to anyone, not just me.

I have now edited that post because earlier yesterday evening, I received a surprising email from Karen in which she stated the comment she wrote in sympathy about my father-in-law was not only sincere, but also intended to put the past where it belongs -- behind us -- and to initiate a truce. And Karen said she still wanted to initiate a truce.

I emailed back suggesting we talk by phone, thinking if we could each hear each other's voice, we would be able to hear sincerity from each other much better than through email. I also gave her my phone number.

Just minutes later, the phone rang, and Karen and I laughed and occasionally teared up through a wonderful and quite lengthy conversation. We apologized to each other for our past disagreements and mean comments, and we really started talking with each other about who we are as individuals. In doing so, we quickly discovered several fairly unusual things we have in common. We were both prepared to be not only forgiving, but also open-minded because each of us had taken a step on our own in a vulnerable direction -- Karen with her email requesting a truce, and then me by giving her my phone number. Now we have an actual foundation -- and a fairly firm one at that -- for a real friendship.

Our past disagreements seem so silly to us, especially when neither of us can remember what it was that first triggered them. Why not let those things go? Why not be friends? Maybe not bosom buddies, but at least friends who can appreciate each other's stitching and be kind to each other ... I think we both felt a lot better about ourselves after the phone call.

There is so much else going on in the world -- things I don't have to remind anyone of, I know, but things which are actually causing loss of life because other people in allegedly more important positions can't be bothered to admit their mistakes, or sit down and talk with each other while treating each other like human beings and with a modicum of respect. I think about those other things going on in the world every day, and I'm quite active politically as far as contacting my Senators, Representatives, etc., to let them know what I think they should do to resolve things. Most of the time, I don't feel like I'm very effective at making anything happen.

But when I received Karen's email, and then her phone call in response to my email, and as we talked, I did feel like maybe I could actually cause some real change, at least in what is my little part of the world. I mentioned this to Karen, too, that we could set a different example by being the first -- but hopefully not the last! -- to STOP the meanness, which reminded me of a quote I'd read earlier this week somewhere:

A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. ~ Margaret Mead

Contrary to our usual perceptions, a gift is always unexpected, never obligatory. I think sometimes we forget that in our materialistic world where we feel we "have to" give so-and-so a gift for her birthday or on Christmas. Such is not the case; we always choose to give a gift, and that choice is what makes the gift so special.

Friendship is perhaps the greatest gift of all. Thank you, Karen, for offering me the gift of friendship.

One of My Most Recent Projects

2007-10-01T11:33:00.001-05:00

It's really hard for me to do a happy dance for this piece.

It's by Debbie Rowley of DebBee's Designs, and is called Holiday Highlights Father's Day; the copyright date is 2006.

I stitched it on Zweigart 28 count potato lugana with the charted colors. By the way, if you don't stitch the words "tools," "naps," and "ties," you don't need Crescent Colours Roasted Chestnut at all for this one.

If you stitch this piece on evenweave or linen, I highly recommend making a few of the specialty stitches on the equivalent sized aida first (14 count aida for 28 count linen or evenweave; 16 for 32; 18 for 36) so you know how big to make your stitches on the evenweave or linen. When the whole piece is specialty stitches, as this one is -- and specialty stitches that are new to you and don't involve making any part of a cross stitch, to boot -- it's pretty difficult to determine what is considered over two and what is over one. Or at least, it was for me. I had a heck of a time with that part and could have saved myself hours -- and a lot of frustration -- if I had just picked up a small piece of aida and done a few test stitches. Seriously, it would have taken just minutes to save me a huge amount of time.

As it was, I started off stitching it too small at what turned out to be over one -- and I got a lot of the stitching done, but as you can see, the really neat pattern which is supposed to be created by Debbie's design just doesn't really show up very well (and that's what finally made me decide I must be stitching it too small and needed to start over). I think it would have been fine if I'd been using just one thread, but since I thought I was stitching over two, I was using two threads. I haven't decided if the first attempt is going to get frogged or trashed -- these stitches are in there pretty tightly, so ripping them out won't be easy ... but I do hate to throw away a good piece of fabric.

After a second start, I got the count right, though I still had a bit of difficulty with each new section. Grab a piece of aida for this one, I tell you (not to stitch the piece -- unless you want to use aida, of course -- but just to test drive these stitches ... don't be stubborn like me!)! Maybe five or so hours later, I was done.

This piece is really attractive in person, and I think I will probably end up making more for the other men in my life. I find men are really difficult to find the right patterns to stitch for but this pattern is perfect (especially with the opportunity to change colors) ... but I'm just not ready right now.

You see, I made this for my father-in-law, Dad, for his retirement on August 31, 2007. When he died, I was working on finishing it off into what could be used either as a bookmark or hung up as a small bellpull (those are four-sided stitches all around; I planned to use CA Wells' joining technique to attach a second piece of lugana the same size as the back). Dad did get to see it because I took it to the hospital to show him; I can't remember if that was a day by which I pretty much knew he was going to be leaving this world, but I do remember feeling a need to take this to show him -- it was finished except for what I wanted to do with the back and stuff. Only when my DH and I got to the hospital, my DH's sister, who had been visiting her dad all day, wouldn't come out, so that meant I couldn't go in because the number of visitors Dad could have at one time was limited. So I gave this to my DH to show to his dad. I actually never got to see him alive again.

After Dad died, I wasn't sure at first what to do with it. I knew there were several people I could give it to who might like it, including my DH, but that just didn't feel right. I wanted to make DH his own ... not give him the one he knew would have been his father's. Giving this to anyone else just didn't feel right; I made this for Dad, and in the five years of my marriage, it's the only thing I'd ever stitched for him. I wanted him to have it.

So at the visitation, I asked my mother-in-law if I could put it in with him, and she took it from me and put it on the pillow next to him. I would have put it somewhere a little less prominent, but I'm glad it's with him. Well, I know it's not really him, but you know what I mean.

Still, it's not in a happy dancing place ... even though I know Dad is.

Something Different Again

2007-09-29T23:46:00.000-05:00

Time for another week of unconscious mutterings (week 243) ... Now that this is becoming a habit rather than something different, I need to think of a different post title ... Suggestions are welcome.

Crook :: George W.

Career :: Pressure

Freckles :: Shoulders

Scramble :: Eggs

Mistake :: Opportunity

Telephone :: Communication

Thank you :: Dr. Lynne Johannessen

Obstruction :: Dad

24/7 :: Exhausted

SciFi :: Really LOOOOOOOOONG books written by authors who badly needed editors to restrict them to a certain number of pages, and to instruct them to name their characters something pronounceable

More of Something Different

2007-09-23T06:41:00.000-05:00

It feels like I just did this, which is because I just did ... It's fun. This is week 242:

Singles :: Kraft

Blaze :: Orange

Sandwich :: Yum

Outside :: Cold

Gooey :: Ick

Industry :: Loud

Exclusive :: Expensive

Warranty :: the expiration date, after which, everything on some big, expensive item will break

Magical :: Cats

Heels :: Foolishness for girls who haven't yet had surgery on their feet/ankles

Something Different

2007-09-21T07:40:00.000-05:00

I like free association, and I've been reading these on Lady Periphaeria's blog for a while, so I decided to play along at Unconscious Mutterings, too. I'm starting with week 241:

Rita :: my aunt's friend

Comedy :: half hour

Polar :: winds

Idiots :: Illinois doctors

Perception :: depth

Infected :: hospital

Fake :: except for my mother-in-law, my female in-laws

Relating :: difficult, probably not worth it

Distraction :: television

Gamble :: noisy

SERIAL KILLER Carle Foundation Hospital Murders Again

2007-09-16T02:48:00.000-05:00

This time, the victim was my beloved father-in-law, Michael Kent Orn, aged 65. I always called him, "Dad."

His death was caused by MEDICAL MALPRACTICE of Carle Foundation Hospital doctors, who, on September 11, 2007, ordered he drink the complete, usual adult dose of a Fleet's Soda preparation mixed with orange gatorade as preparation for a colonoscopy scheduled for the next morning. This would be the last of any kind of food, drink, or nutrition he would receive, other than that delivered intravenously.

Dad DID NOT NEED this typical colonoscopy preparation because he had been a very atypical patient. After being admitted to the hospital through the ER on September 2nd, 2007, he had been on strictly a liquid diet for more than a week while doctors waited for a bowel obstruction to clear. Therefore, there was nothing IN his intestines to flush out with the Fleet's Soda prep -- EXCEPT, very unfortunately, at least part of the original bowel obstruction, which immediately recurred once Dad drank enough of the prep solution.

But Carle Hospital's asshole, I mean, "expert" doctors cannot possibly deviate from any of their prescribed procedures because it would require them to actually THINK.

Dad and I BEGGED the nurses multiple times to check with the doctor, and then to get a doctor in there to actually PHYSICALLY EXAMINE him because he was obviously becoming increasingly uncomfortable and concerned as he drank more of the preparation. Dad's abdomen was distended and rock hard after he'd drunk less than half the Fleet's Soda prep solution. Over the space of two hours, his bowels did not make a SOUND and he did not require use of the bathroom at all; he should have been going fairly constantly starting no more than about fifteen or twenty minutes after he first started drinking the disgusting concoction.

Although the nurses did contact the doctor perhaps three times, no doctor came to actually SEE Dad, much less EXAMINE him; the nurses did not physically touch Dad's abdomen to verify how hard and distended it actually was; and the order from the doctor remained the same: Dad was to drink the entire solution.

Suddenly, having not yet drunk quite half of the Fleet's solution, Dad went into respiratory distress because his obstructed intestines in his hard, distended abdomen were pressing into his diaphragm and lung, which prevented him from taking deep enough breaths to fully and properly oxygenate his blood.

Dad only had his left lung, by the way. His right lung was removed in January of this year, when he was pronounced cured of lung cancer by his doctors. The fact that he had only one lung is why the doctors did not consider surgery to find and remove the bowel obstruction; such a surgery would have taken as much as twelve hours, and this would have required him to be on a respirator. In Dad's weakened state, the doctors believed that once he was put onto a respirator, he would never be able to get off of it, and so the possibility of surgery for the bowel obstruction was eliminated.

The experiences of respiratory distress and having his stomach pumped only made Dad even weaker. Although he tried, they were simply too much from which to recover.

The saddest part of the whole situation is that Dad just retired on Friday, August 31st, 2007, and of course, like anyone does, he had been dearly looking forward to spending his retirement with his family and doing the things he enjoyed. Instead, he was admitted to the hospital within two days of his retirement, and died fifteen days later on September 15, 2007 at approximately 4:30 p.m. central time.

Validation!

2007-08-25T06:48:00.001-05:00

Thursday, August 23rd, I had my appointment with the neurologist about the MRIs I had last Saturday (the 18th) and received some rather shocking medical news. Not what I was hoping for, and not anything I had prepared myself for, although I thought I had pretty much covered all the possibilities in my mind -- and although this information should prove very useful in obtaining MEDICALLY NECESSARY pain treatment.

Basically, nearly every single disc in my back is herniated or nearly so, and because so many are damaged, it's considered inoperable. It's a wonder I can move at all -- and things have been this way for probably close to twenty five years (this has to have been caused by the school bus accident I was in when I was in seventh grade), and only just now has anyone though to bother to run the test to see it -- and he ran it for a different reason (to diagnose or rule out multiple sclerosis).

Exercise is pretty much out of the question for any reason except swimming and bike riding -- and we can't afford a bike or a pool membership right now -- because one wrong move could mean paralysis and a wheelchair for life. That's the same instruction DH received from the same neurologist close to a year ago -- because of ONE disc in this precarious situation. The neurologist actually didn't get that far with me because he wants to run more tests; I suppose it's possible he could tell me NO exercise and to get in a wheelchair now so I don't really screw myself up -- LOL -- would I even notice?

So, now I know why my back hurts so badly all the time -- and I do NOT feel guilty about it. It's NOT my imagination, it's NOT caused by depression, it's NOT because I'm faking it, or because I'm lazy (as my brother insists on every rare instance he has time in his busy life to have anything to do with me). In fact, I'm LAMINATING these test results to show doctors that I am NOT DEPRESSED but have a REAL, EXTREMELY SIGNIFICANT, PHYSICAL INJURY causing INDESCRIBABLE PAIN which it is INHUMANE not to properly manage with appropriate pain medications.

But it was a huge shock and really threw me off Thursday and Friday. I didn't even need my usual pain medication (which is not NEARLY enough for this type of injury!) Friday because I was actually having physical symptoms of shock and just felt numb from the news. I certainly could have received far more useless news, and I realize this will be very useful, but it's still an awful lot to digest right now.

Meanwhile, we are continuing the MRI investigation looking for signs of MS because the neurologist still thinks it's worth considering -- or at least worth completely ruling out since we've come this far already. The brain and cervical spine will be done with and without contrast next Tuesday morning, right before an appointment with my PCP, after which I will be immediately leaving town for Michigan to see a doctor willing to prescribe REAL pain meds -- and thankfully, I now have something to show her besides my diagnosis of fibromyalgia that shows her just how badly I need them!

For those who are wondering, there has still been no MRI of the breast for the still growing "lump," which now feels more like half a slice of bologna. I need to do another major rant on this particular subject, but I swear Illinois must be where everyone who nearly flunked out of medical school comes to practice. However, I'm actually much less concerned about the breast issue at this point. If that's breast cancer, based on my other breast symptoms, it's IBC, the 95% fatal kind WITH treatment. And unfortunately, the treatment for that is always chemo and radiation first before surgery -- and I will not do chemo with odds that low. Cut anything off of or out of me you want to, but I have no interest in wasting the last few months of my life just to die looking like a concentration camp victim and feeling like crap, in order that everyone else can say, "At least, she fought really hard." I've already fought really hard, darn it, while none of the dipstick doctors in this area were listening, and if people don't already realize that, then screw them. The only reason for a diagnosis there would be to give my husband what he needs for a lawsuit -- and if I suddenly die, I guess he'll get that from an autopsy, now won't he?

Thanks to all of you for your support.

I Hope You Dance

2007-08-19T23:56:00.001-05:00

I took this picture of My Treasures Workstation (pattern by Just A Thought from Judy Odell) while it was on display during the 2007 National Counted Cross Stitch Show (NCCSS) competition.

Interestingly, this piece received both my highest score (from Betsy Evans), as well as my lowest score (from infamous pottymouth Eileen Bennett). The difference between the highest and lowest scores was 14 points, and based on the two judges' comments, their scores were based specifically on the workmanship of my stitches.

What a Strange Search String

2007-08-07T05:19:00.000-05:00

What else can you do but laugh when you see this in your site stats?

Is there actually a cross stitch sampler intended to be stitched for an OB/GYN? I'm not sure I want to know ...

Official Announcement

2007-08-05T22:03:00.000-05:00

INDEPENDENT NEEDLEWORK NEWS is now up and running.

For me, that counts as a happy dance!

Thanks in advance for all publicity or word of mouth!

A Quick Update for All the Visitors

2007-07-27T23:20:00.001-05:00

Wow! I never get this much traffic here ... Hi!

I am working diligently on getting my new business home ready and hope to be able to announce it's location within just a few days. I'll be continuing on with the type of thing I had started doing at CraftGossip, especially after getting emails from so many of you who've told me just how much you appreciated what I was doing.

Thank you for those, too -- it's always nice to hear that you've accomplished what you set out to do, and it turned out I was actually doing that myself ... But I didn't actually hear those words until you were worried I might disappear. (Don't worry -- *I* always knew there was never a chance of that happening because I had fallen in love with what I was doing and know it has a value to the stitching community.)

Also thank you so much to everyone for your emails and even phone calls of support. They've been fantastic as well, and I really want to contact each of you for permission to publish the things you have all written about copyright because each of you did such a wonderful and eloquent job talking about what copyright means to your life.

I also would be remiss if I did not publicly say that CraftGossip paid me promptly and in full -- as far as I know, anyway (a grand total of $50.74 for about six months of work) -- and I have no hesitation in saying that while they were extremely confused about copyright law, they showed themselves to be generally honest and decent people by meeting their financial contractual obligations to me in a very timely and professional manner.

Last, I want you all to know that I am doing okay. I am very, very tired. But I am really quite excited about this and not unhappy at all about how things have worked out. It's quite nice for a change, too! :)

Needlework vs. Tampons

2007-07-25T07:43:00.001-05:00

CraftGossip doesn't understand needlework, and wanted "craft news."

My writing is of a higher class.

Best of luck to anyone who might want the job, but be forewarned Shellie didn't consider ANY of my posts craft-related. It's true; none were about tampons. Of course, as the co-founder of CraftBits, which has no needlework projects at all, Shellie has no idea what a needlework project IS or why stitchers don't care to discuss tampons.

(Perhaps I was wrong to think it was all just string.)

I am venturing out on my own. Please stay tuned to The Needle's Bewitching Eye or email me for updates.

A Great Reminder

2007-07-23T20:36:00.000-05:00

I can't listen to books on tape ... my mind wanders too easily.

But I still love this old post from Cameo.

It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are
far more than our abilities. ~ Albus Dumbledore

The thing is, in reality, the majority of people object to those who make the kind of choices of which Albus Dumbledore approved.

Of course, if things were any other way, the choices wouldn't be so important.

And Around We Go (originally posted on CraftGossip 7/19/07)

2007-07-19T10:21:00.000-05:00

My job as the Needlework Editor at CraftGossip.com is one job (my bosses are in Australia).

My job as Show Director for the National Counted Cross Stitch Show (NCCSS) was a second, entirely separate job (my boss was located at Rockome Gardens in Arcola, IL, USA).

There was absolutely NO connection between the two other than that I utilized my CraftGossip blog to advertise the NCCSS -- at no cost to Rockome Gardens, by the way -- because it fit in exactly with the job description for my CraftGossip blog. Without me and my CraftGossip blog, the 2007 NCCSS would have completely failed because there was NO OTHER ADVERTISING FOR THE SHOW WORTH MENTIONING (although I did get us a spot in The Gift of Stitching online magazine ... which Butch Phillips apparently thought so unimportant, even though it would have hit our TARGET AUDIENCE of stitchers, that he couldn't be bothered to pay the $40 fee for the one month spot available).

Butch Phillips, the self-titled Mayor of Rockome Gardens, according to his TV commercials which must have cost thousands of dollars to make and air, clearly does not understand anything about paid blogging or Internet marketing. He has several times made the erroneous statement mentioning CraftGossip as a "pay for hit site," and made it sound like I receive $1.00 for every hit or something equally ridiculous! I don't even receive $.01 per hit, and that is because CraftGossip is NOT a pay per click program. Pay per click advertising is a type of Search Engine Marketing ... and CraftGossip is NOT -- you guessed it! -- a search engine. Rather, to the best of my understanding, it is an affiliate (have you checked out CraftBits yet?), and specifically, a revenue sharing program which uses contextual advertising.

A lot of people seem to think I made a great big bunch of money from CraftGossip because of NCCSS-related posts, and that:

1. It was a conflict of interest.

2. I should be paying Butch because it brought so much traffic to my site.

3. I really shouldn't complain about not getting paid by the NCCSS or Rockome Gardens because I made enough already through CraftGossip thanks to Butch.

The truth is CraftGossip is a fledgling craft-related blog site, and I was lucky to get in on the ground floor as one of their first editors. I signed up on one of the last days of January 2007. I have not yet received a payment from CraftGossip, and that is because less than $50 is due me at the moment. As soon as my earnings total $50, I'll receive payment.

If people really think I don't deserve to be paid for my work AFTER THEY HAVE READ ALL THE FACTS, I'll determine how much of my current earnings balance was earned through NCCSS-related posts, and then send Butch a check for 90% of whatever that amount turns out to be. I'm willing to do this not because I'm already rich off of CraftGossip, but because 90% of very little is still hardly anything.

So my answers to the above three points are:

1. None of my bosses at the time minded, so it was not a conflict of interest.

2. Butch hired me knowing ALL ABOUT CraftGossip, and with the full intention of using it as a resource to advertise the NCCSS. I was more than happy to do that, as my CraftGossip blog wouldn't begin to earn money without Internet traffic, and a link from Rockome Gardens' website to me here on CraftGossip would have been very beneficial. Butch was to link to my CraftGossip blog immediately after he hired me; that was part of my CONTRACT with him. He failed to meet his contractual obligations and didn't link to me until approximately seven weeks afterward. This lengthy delay caused me to lose out on a significant opportunity to develop an audience for my CraftGossip blog -- some portion of which would still be regular readers today, which is called a "loss of future income" in legal terms. Butch is lucky I'm not presently planning to sue him for that loss of future income, but then, I'm still attempting to collect what I was owed to begin with from him.

3. Many needlework designers work two jobs -- their designing job, and their "paying job." I was working two jobs also -- my CraftGossip job, and what was supposed to be MY paying job until I do actually bring in enough to comfortably rely on just my CraftGossip earnings. Butch stiffed me. It's similar to working one job during the week and a second one on weekends. I expected to get paid for both, and I trust I will eventually get paid by CraftGossip -- but Butch stole from me. I was NOT a willing, informed, or consenting VOLUNTEER for either CraftGossip or Rockome Gardens' NCCSS. CraftGossip knows this and is honest. Butch took advantage of me and is dishonest.

If you still don't believe me, consider this: Would I post this here on CraftGossip where my bosses will see it if it weren't true? It IS true. I already asked for and received permission to post this from Shellie, and of course I'll be hanging onto her email.

On Rounds (originally posted on CraftGossip on July 18, 2007)

2007-07-18T10:30:00.000-05:00

To the untrustworthy bobbleheads who destroyed the opportunity I had to work with CA Wells with the tactless taps of your keystrokes, the game's over.

Regardless of your intentions toward me, it was foolish and cruel for you to steal away from stitchers in the Midwest an opportunity to take classes with CA.

You realize I shared my excitement with you about working with CA only in the STRICTEST CONFIDENCE. Of course you do; that's what made your violation of that confidence so exceedingly delicious!

Somehow you took my two sentences totaling seventeen words, and by the power of blue whale testicles, decided to out-scoop ME. I would OBVIOUSLY have made the announcement at the appropriate time on MY CraftGossip blog. This blistering betrayal was another perfectly planned and perfectly executed element in the perfect crime.

You are a moronic loon to have contacted CA Wells for more details -- except you were intentionally destroying this opportunity in order to hurt me. The surest way to accomplish this was to bother the incredibly popular, extremely busy, absolutely #1 in demand needlework teacher/designer with direct emails. Ticking off CA was easily achieved by involving all your hollaback girlfriends in the project. Extra credit was awarded for the request that CA teach a Betsy Morgan piece.

After the more than thirteen hours mostly wasted in two different ERs Tuesday, I don't have time or spirit left for you -- or much of anything else, for that matter.

Now, please give the link to this post (that link is http://theneedlesbewitchingeye.blogspot.com/2007/07/on-rounds-originally-posted-on.html ) wherever you've already spread the first bits of your now false advertising -- and please at least have the decency to quote me accurately this time.

Friday the 13th = Feminist Field Day

2007-07-13T07:04:00.000-05:00

When confronted with this picture,

the best text news.yahoo.com could come up with was this:

Chinese visit a four-story, free-of-charge public restroom in Chongqing, China Saturday July 7, 2007. They're flushing with pride in a southwestern Chinese city where a recently opened porcelain palace features an Egyptian facade, soothing music and more than 1,000 toilets spread out over 3,000 square meters (32,290 square feet). Officials in Chongqing are preparing to submit an application to Guinness World Records to have the public restroom listed as the world's largest, state-run China Central Television reported Friday.(AP Photo)

and they ran it under the title:

China debuts opulent public restroom

Say what?

(It was the #1 picture on Yahoo on Friday, July 13th, which is how I came up with the title of this post.)

What She Said

2007-07-04T08:37:00.000-05:00

This article really puts into perspective exactly how I ended up feeling about my job as an investigator with Lucent Technologies Corporate Computer and Network Security by the time I finally got myself out of there in April of 2001.

Although it was one of the most interesting jobs I've ever done, I initially got into that line of work because I wanted to help people. Among other things, I wanted to protect women from sexual harassment in the workplace and help them feel and actually be safer at work.

However, by the time I left the job, not only had I realized I wasn't even helping the company, but I had also become a victim of gender harassment myself many times over. I worked in one of the two organizations which was supposed to SET THE EXAMPLE for the rest of the company (the other being the Equal Employment Opportunity/Affirmative Action, or EEO/AA group); I had a B.A. and an M.S. in criminal justice; and I dealt with severe violations all day, every day; but I couldn't even manage to protect myself from victimization because I worked in a dramatically male-dominated field.

In fact, I had reported my own situation to the EEO/AA group no less than five times -- and WON the investigation every time. The problem, though, remained because, as the only female employee in my group, I was the only one complaining about gender harassment, and so it was rather a simple solution to just ignore me. I actually was told often, "Nobody else has a problem," and after I heard it enough times, it did start to sound an awful lot like, "You are crazy." Even the EEO/AA investigator (who was a male, by the way, and a very decent one, too) couldn't help much with that, since he couldn't be in my shoes all the time. I had to deal with reality, and I had to deal with it alone. It was as natural to my male bosses and coworkers to treat me as a second class citizen as it was for them to urinate while standing. It would never have occurred to them to analyze their own actions, and even when someone pointed out to them exactly how they were treating me differently from everyone else, they still had difficulty seeing it for themselves. More importantly, they refused to change their behavior. Or maybe more accurately, they didn't think they SHOULD change their behavior because I was ONLY a woman and therefore not worth showing that much respect.

Earlier on the day I decided to resign, it had become clear to me that I needed to go back to the EEO/AA group again because the harassment was still continuing. But something inside me broke that day. I just couldn't do it anymore. It didn't matter. Or maybe I didn't matter. It was a losing battle I had been trying to fight, and the only person I was capable of saving was MYSELF.

There were always going to be more people looking at pornographic websites on company time using company resources because they were ADDICTED (we should have been referring them to therapists and doctors, rather than terminating their employment); job security wasn't a problem. But if eliminating pornography from the workplace was our measure of how we were making sure to treat women better and to provide a safe workplace for them, then the fact that we did NOT have to worry about job security meant we were clearly failing. And I knew from my own experience as a victim that using pornography or the lack thereof as a measure of my safety as a woman in that workplace was grossly in error. I also knew that working within the system to try to change it and make it better had been unsuccessful. I finally gave myself the freedom to move on, or maybe I just gave up. Either way, I ended up here -- somewhere else, somewhere a little bit less painful to my psyche most days.

So that's the experience I bring with me to this conversation, and I think Susie Bright has a terrific idea -- one that certainly has yet to be tried:

Here's a tip: Wanna stop the cycle of "safety panics" at your workplace? Give each person who works some privacy and dignity.

Then look at the pay scales of everyone in the company, and give all the secretaries, assistants, and janitorial staff a gigantic raise. Watch how suddenly, all the "unsafe" feelings disappear as if by magic!

I'd like to find out what would happen if her idea were put into practice, but I doubt it will ever happen. Sadly, I think the biggest reason it won't ever happen is because a woman suggested it.

But in case some male corporate type is reading this, I DARE YOU to give her idea a try. And don't you forget to give her the credit for it, either.

Still A Shyster

2007-07-01T00:06:00.001-05:00

Butch thinks I should be satisfied with the $625 he has paid me so far, which he says is for five weeks of work. The following is my response, and it is also posted in several places on CraftGossip.

I have NOT received my full pay. NOT EVEN CLOSE.

(1) I worked for 7.5 FULL WEEKS. I started on 4/7/07, the same day on which I interviewed with you, Butch. It was not even until 5/23/07 -- ALREADY 6.5 WEEKS into the job -- that I made my numerous unsuccessful attempts to get a paycheck from you known to anyone else. At that point, instead of paying me which would have resolved the problem quickly and amicably, you refused to contact me privately either by phone or email and resorted to criticizing me for making things "public" -- when what I did was let the designers involved with the NCCSS as vendors and instructors know about the situation through PRIVATE, BY INVITATION ONLY, YahooGroups I'd previously set up to organize the show. Despite my better judgment, I then continued to work another full week, for a total of 7.5 FULL WEEKS, while still unsuccessfully trying to get my paycheck. LOOK AT A CALENDAR, BUTCH, AND PAY ME WHAT YOU OWE ME, THIEF. WITH 30% INTEREST!!!

(2) You agreed to pay me $10 an hour for ALL hours onsite. I was onsite for a 2+ hour meeting with you and Angie on 4/10/07. Standard operating procedures dictated by both the state of Illinois and the federal government state you must also pay me for the 2.25 hour round-trip commute to that meeting and its mileage, since I was a contract employee and my normal work location was out of my home. Total hours onsite are thus estimated to be 4.5 at $10 an hour. For the mileage, you can put my address and Rockome's address into Maps On Us and double that for round-trip mileage of 113 miles.

(3) You also owe me reimbursement for mailing expenses for items I mailed to you for NCCSS business (not my personal NCCSS issues as a show participant or to take classes) during the 7.5 weeks I worked for you. I estimate a total of $8.

(4) You also owe me reimbursement for business use of my cable Internet and phone for two months, which cost me $109 per month, so you owe me $109.

(5) Because you knew the value of the job I was doing, and because doing this form of payment was something you could write off as a business expense (and was also something which you did not have to pay me all at once, which was beneficial for you), you had also agreed IN WRITING to pay ALL my expenses to attend Celebration of Needlework. The hotel costs alone are over $1000. You were also to pay travel costs, food costs while there, and class attendance and registration fees. Class registration fees were to be paid on 5/18/07. I estimate you owe me a bare minimum of $2500 for this part of your legal contract with me.

(6) I worked 16 hour days straight for 7.5 weeks (and I wasn't spending the majority of my time reading a library book like Tonya did for $10 an hour just because she was onsite during the show -- hi, Tonya!). Because the initial $500 per month we agreed to comes nowhere near close to minimum wage for the hours I needed to work in order to get the job you assigned to me done and also, obviously, did not include overtime, I was forced to file two complaints with the Illinois Department of Labor, and they have accepted both as justified. The first is for non-payment of wages. The second is for minimum wage and overtime violations; this complaint totaled closer to $10,000 due me (which certainly justifies my demand for the Celebration of Needlework compensation you promised me).

These are the numbers the Illinois Department of Labor has, so you might as well get your math straight now. It will look much better for you and the owners of Rockome Gardens if you are at least properly trying to take care of this matter in an amicable fashion when they come to investigate. The Illinois Department of Labor can and very well may fine you extensively in addition to requiring you to pay me what I am owed and/or put you entirely out of business. I think that would be a shame and tried everything I could to avoid this route, but you refused to even pick up the phone and call me -- and I'm the easy one to reach.

Impeach Him!

2007-06-29T03:31:00.000-05:00

Can you believe this post from the Mayor of Rockome Gardens, Butch Phillips? (I'm leaving his grammatical and other writing errors intact, by the way, even though it pains me to do so on my own blog, LOL. For clarity's sake, his comments are in putrid lime green.)

Setting here logging on to my email and finding 43 emails in the NCCSS folder, I thought to myself what now. This time I am excited about seeing all the posts, The show has gone extremely well, I would like to thank TONYA and ANGIE who without them this show would not have happened. I would even like to thank Stacy for the start of the process. Yes it was a struggle and yes I stepped on a few toes, but I think it is safe to say that with the excitement for next year I am here to make this statement very plain.

It is SOLELY due to the ethics of Angie Miller (whose family were the PREVIOUS owners of Rockome Gardens), that I received a check signed by Larry Daily (one of the new owners of Rockome Gardens) for less than half the amount owed to me by Rockome Gardens for the work I performed on behalf of the NCCSS.

But Butch is such a sleaze he can't even be bothered to give me any credit when he THANKS people.

Without me, this show would have been dead in the water. The pages and pages of information I put up on the web about it at CraftGossip are the ONLY way stitchers could find detailed information about the show, and everyone -- from Butch, to Angie, to Tonya (hi, Tonya!), to Larry and the other new owners of Rockome Gardens, to the designers who were vending and/or teaching at the show, to all the stitchers who attended -- KNOWS it.

I could have taken all that information off CraftGossip when I didn't get my first paycheck from Rockome Gardens. But I didn't because doing so would have hurt the show's outcome. While I wouldn't have minded hurting Rockome Gardens' income after they couldn't be bothered to pay me, I did NOT want to hurt the designers' businesses any further than they'd already been harmed by Butch's refusal to properly advertise the show in the first place. (Here is where the importance of the fact that I'm a stitcher -- or at least, I was ... my heart is too broken for me to feel much like picking up a needle right now -- cannot be denied. First and foremost, I wanted this show to succeed BECAUSE I AM -- or was -- A STITCHER. That was the main reason I wanted and took the job as Show Director just two months before the show was to start, KNOWING everything was in a huge state of upheaval and I had a huge mountain to climb -- and convince a whole bunch of other people to climb, too.) So instead, I put up a truthful disclaimer about my own experience with Rockome Gardens and the reservations that caused me to have about the show, withdrew my personal endorsement of the show, and kept stitchers as well informed as I could of the goings-on at Rockome Gardens once I was no longer in the loop myself.

The show would have done better if Butch had done HIS JOB and kept his LEGAL CONTRACT with me to advertise my CraftGossip blog so people would have known when they came to Rockome's website where to go for information, but the show did amazingly well this year -- IN SPITE OF BUTCH'S NEGLECT, and BECAUSE OF MY DEDICATION. In fact, Donna Heidler of Simply Old-Fashioned told me it was her best show ANYWHERE, EVER. There were 229 entries entered into the competition, which was about half the number entered in the last show held (the twentieth anniversary show in 2004) -- not bad at all considering the two year hiatus or the fact that I only had two months to get the word out about the show and had my BOSS, of all people, working against me!

The 2008 National Counted Cross Stitch Show will even be better, YES IT WILL RETURN. I plan on recruiting Angie and Tonya and Connie to be a part of the team.

This is hysterical, especially considering the email I received from someone who stated that everyone knows I'm Coni (who was brave enough to write a comment on this post, which was originally posted on CraftGossip, expressing her displeasure with the NCCSS this year). If Butch actually is planning to hire me under a different name because he doesn't know it's me ... Shoot, it would almost be worth not getting paid a SECOND time just to pull that one over on everyone! Pull my finger!

We will have the dates posted in the very near future, This group will remain active and I invite those positive and the negative to share constructive improvements so we can work even harder to make it better together. I would hope that the posts would be on our group here or sent to me or Angie and not posted on pay for hit sites. I do not have any association with any pay for hit site nor do I support these sites.

Well, Butch is certainly correct that he did absolutely NOTHING to support me, not even to honor his LEGAL AGREEMENT with me. However, he did have a BINDING oral and WRITTEN (by email, yes, but still written) CONTRACT with me to honor, and that contract included linking to CraftGossip ASAP after I was hired on April 7th. Butch failed to complete ANY of the things he agreed to do as payment for the work I contracted to do. I completed all the work I agreed to -- and more. No amount of Butch's revisionist history -- or perhaps he's more comfortable calling it a historical re-enactment, which they do so much of at Rockome Gardens now -- will change the fact that he DID HAVE a LEGAL OBLIGATION which required of him not only an an association with but support of my blog on CraftGossip. He can criticize my blog all he wants, but at least I'm trying to make an honest living (I would have succeeded at that if Butch had actually paid me in full for the work I had done), rather than stealing from other people by breach of contract or making promises I don't keep, like Butch.

And here for the edification of all is Maggie Pringlemeir's response to Butch Phillips, which he would not allow through to the Rockome list. (I'll keep Butch's comments in the putrid lime green, and Maggie's will be in royal purple for clarity.)

Note to the list ..

I sent a message on June 15, wishing all of you much success for this show .. but my message was deleted and was never posted. This may well be an exercise in futility, but I'm going to step up and respond to Butch's comments, particularly since he SAID he WANTS the negative ones to be posted here.

Butch ..

I'll never say anything behind your back that I will not say directly to your face .. so .. since you said that you want truth and open honesty .. here it is.

"I would like to thank TONYA and ANGIE who without them this show would not have happened. I would even like to thank Stacy for the start of the process."

What about HEATHER? The woman you contracted with BECAUSE she had a highly visable public website to help promote your show? You may remember her .. she worked a couple of months for you putting in 18 to 20 hour days. Stacy, for her own reasons, had to back away. Heather worked her own health into a frazzle. Can't you find the courtesy in your heart to thank her publicly?

"This group will remain active and I invite those positive and the negative to share constructive improvements so we can work even harder to make it better together. I would hope that the posts would be on our group here or sent to me or Angie and not posted on pay for hit sites. I do not have any association with any pay for hit site nor do I support these sites."

Truly amazing .. since the reason you "hired" Heather was for the exposure of that website. Today I spoke directly with her and asked her point blank .. somewhere, somehow, down the line, you should be generating "some" income from the number of hits your website receives, right? THAT HAS NOT HAPPENED YET. YES, at some point in the future .. that theoretically should happen. It is PAID FOR by the ADVERTISING on the website. It does NOT come out of the person who visit's checkbooks or their pockets in any way. ALL companies advertise .. even Rockome spent HOW MANY thousands of $ on a non-descriptive advert on national programming. Apparently, Butch, you see the value of name recognition and were willing to dip into your pocket and pay for it as a business expense. That is PRECISELY what advertisers do. But they do NOT charge those who SEE the advertising for the privilege. For you to infer otherwise is misleading and an insult to the intelligence of every stitcher involved, period. For someone NOT affiliated .. you certainly wanted Heather to spend hours getting the show information, class descriptions, and other important data up and out there. THAT, she did. She honored the terms of her agreement with you. Step on toes? There are words for what you did .. but I won't use them on this list.

"I plan on recruiting Angie and Tonya and Connie to be a part of the team."

Like many others .. I'm curious WHO Connie is. Yes, it's apparent that I have intense loyalties to my friend Heather. She has NEVER lied to me, never cheated me, never told me anything that turned out to be a half-truth. In the years I've known her, when she says she'll do something .. I could ALWAYS count on her to follow through. I still can. ANY employer with a lick of sense in his head would recognize those qualities and work hard to coax her to come back and be involved with this show, rather than use this forum to take not-so-subtle snipes at her. Even with the harsh feelings and how badly she was treated, Heather still cared enough about this show to come, to speak with Angie several times and to make many suggestions about how to make the next show a better one. She genuinely CARES about not only the BUSINESS of the show, Butch, she cares about the PEOPLE of the show. She cares about the integrity of the judging process and the standards.

Which brings me to one other comment. I've seen the original post from Coni and recognize the name from other lists I'm on and involved with. Some of you seem to think that those coments were written by Heather with a fake name to hide behind. Let me assure you that the woman exists and that SHE wrote the note herself. Many ofher comments were totally valid. The promotion of this show SHOULD have begun as soon as Butch took over .. not 8 weeks beforehand. Heather was set an impossible task working with people that she knew actively disliked her and tried to block her every positive or constructive move .. and yet .. she came in and did an amazing task. When she pulled back and away .. didn't any of you realize that she had TRIED to go through the appropriate private channels, and was ignored, the same as I was? Shame on all of you who said mean things about her. Just remember .. what goes around, comes around and karma can be severe. Heather deserves an apology from many of the people on this list. I hope she receives them. And knowing her, if she does, she'll post a thank you for that.

Truly, I'm GLAD the show went as well as it did. I know that Angie worked her tail off, too. Start making plans and doing the scutwork NOW for the next show. As Coni said .. get the information about the local Guilds and contact them to get the word out. That cannot be done in a whirlwind of a few weeks, it requires time to do that groundwork.

You have a unique opportunity right now. It's very rare for a show that has died to be resurrected. You have a good chance of doing that. If you can, it will not only be good for Rockome, it will be good for the stitchers and the industry. I wish all of you well with your efforts.

Maggie Pringlemeir, D Div, PhD
DrMaggie @ aol.com

I'd post Butch's response back to Maggie, but as that was in private email to her, instead I'll just post MY response to him here:

As I said above, I could have removed everything from CraftGossip when I didn't get my first paycheck from Rockome Gardens. I didn't do that because I did NOT want to hurt the designers' businesses any further than YOU, Butch, had already harmed them by your neglect and refusal to properly advertise the show in the first place. Instead, I put up a truthful disclaimer about my own experience, withdrew my personal endorsement of the show, and kept stitchers as well informed as I could of the goings-on at Rockome Gardens once I was no longer in the loop myself. That's a long way from trying to give the show a black eye or derail it. If the controversy this created helped give me any income at all (as if that were any of YOUR business, Butch), I damned well deserved it, you lying thief -- and it brought more income to you, too, because it brought the curious stitchers who wouldn't have come at all this year to Rockome Gardens just to check out the show for a day. So thank the controversy YOU created; I think that was your intention all along. All I did was SPEAK OUT and make it public -- and in doing so, I at least doubled the income the NCCSS brought to you and to each vendor. Now I expect my cut, and I still expect the rest of what you owed me to begin with IN FULL!

Listen to the Jerk

2007-06-29T02:00:00.000-05:00

Too bad he wouldn't help me advertise the National Counted Cross Stitch Show this well.

As Verbs Change Tense Around Me

2007-06-10T03:24:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, I met a wonderful, wise, and wickedly witty woman. She was the mother of a new friend of mine. Creel deserves a list of fabulous adjectives, too, but this post is about her mother.

Charl Krauss was an artist who painted with watercolors and sculpted clay. She was a mother and a grandmother. I'm sure she was many more things, too, but I didn't get the chance to find out what, although I knew almost immediately upon meeting her that I wanted the chance to hear about them from her. She was just 67 when she died two weeks later.

During lunch the day I was to meet Charl, Creel and I had been discussing some of my difficulties getting medical treatment, and she told me about having the same kind of problems getting proper treatment for her mother. Her mother was dealing with a number of medical problems, any of which are known to cause extreme pain, and yet every time Charl asked a Carle Clinic doctor for pain medication, she was ignored and left to continue suffering. At least one physician treated her as a drug-seeker -- threatening her that if she didn't stop asking for pain treatment, she'd have to find another doctor. Creel and Charl kept seeing different doctors at Carle Clinic, to which they were limited by their insurance resources (Medicaid/Medicare); they were not financially able to pay a non-Carle doctor.

As I've had the same experience with Carle Clinic doctors, I agreed with Creel that this was elder abuse, and encouraged her to take her mother to my primary care doctor (who I'm sure accepts Medicaid/Medicare and who also would have worked with them financially) to get proper care and pain treatment for her mother. She never got the chance.

After lunch, I followed Creel over to her house to try helping her with some problems she was having with her computer, and that's when I met Charl. I was struck almost immediately by two things. First, Charl reminded me of someone I couldn't quite identify. Second, the house was jarringly cold -- keeping the air conditioning turned up high was most comfortable for Charl. Even so, I recognized just as clearly as if I were looking in a mirror from Charl's wizened appearance and the way she held herself that she was in constant pain.

Charl didn't move from her chair during the entire time of my visit, although she adjusted her position within it often. I recognized that, too -- and the focused, almost trance-like expression which remained on her face no matter what we were discussing. These are the things people who are in excruciating pain learn to do, subconsciously, in order to manage pain which is not being properly medicated. Charl was better at it than I am -- much better. Not once did she lose her train of thought, as I do so often when the pain becomes overwhelming, and have to ask anyone to repeat herself -- at least, not while I was visiting.

Charl's mind was very much alive and as eager for knowledge and conversation as any intelligent person I have ever met. I wish I remembered the afternoon in exquisite detail, but instead what I remember are mostly impressions -- laughing out loud with Creel and Charl, giving and receiving validation over our common experiences, believing each other about the experiences we did not share, and feeling not nearly so alone as I usually do.

I also remember the room being absolutely full of color. There were paintings on every wall, done by Charl and her late husband. Multicultural influences dotted the room -- I remember lots of orange, red, and purple. Lots of warmth, both in color and in the feelings generated by the people within the room, such that the cold from the air conditioning was soon undetectable.

When Creel left the house for a short time to pick up one of her children from school, Charl engaged me in conversation about my own medical issues, which Creel had shared with her. Charl asked many questions about what had happened to me and who I had seen already, and generously offered advice on where to go next. At one point, Charl stopped and actually apologized for asking me, "so many personal questions." I could only laugh and tell her I truly didn't mind, as, after all, I had "put it all out there" on my blog in the first place, and I thanked her because her response -- both the validation and the attempt to assist -- was exactly what I had been seeking. I also thanked her because it is so rare that anyone bothers to do those things -- listen to another, believe her, and try to help.

There were so many things I wanted to ask Charl about her life -- about the interesting pieces of information her daughter Creel had shared with me. But I held back, realizing that would be rude because neither Charl nor Creel had already "put it all out there" on a blog or elsewhere, and assuming of course that there would be another time.

In the meantime, I enjoyed what Charl did choose to share with me immensely. Her response when her 4-month-old grandson managed to poop all over her lap while she was holding him was hysterical, and somehow spoke volumes about much older males who had not treated Charl with the respect she deserved.

On my way out, my eyes fell on a detail among all the colors in the room. It was an elephant, and suddenly I noticed there were elephants everywhere ... and so I admired Charl's elephant collection aloud, and mentioned my own elephant collection at home.

Later that evening after I returned home, I finally figured out who Charl reminded me of ... me. It was not that Charl represented who I'd like to be someday -- although I certainly admired her and would be honored to be like her. It was that I sensed in her, as there is in me, a desperate resignation which comes from having been ignored too long, particularly by doctors. Charl, like me, was a woman struggling valiantly to communicate with and obtain help from a very uncooperative medical system while enduring incredible, untreated pain. Like me, she had thus become fiercely angry and with very, very good reason. In Charl's case at least, that sense of desperate resignation was an emptying hourglass almost out of sand.

Friday afternoon, June 8th, I spoke briefly on the phone with Creel, whom I hadn't heard from for a while. She told me her mother had suddenly passed away. I was shocked and deeply saddened to learn this vital, vibrant, and valuable woman I had met just weeks ago had vanished from this plane of existence.

I was also saddened, but NOT at all shocked, to learn the cause of her untimely -- and certainly excruciatingly painful -- death. The cancer had been missed by numerous physicians over numerous visits at both Carle Foundation Hospital's Emergency Room and Carle Clinic. All these doctors missed diagnosing Charl's cancer SOLELY BECAUSE THEY REFUSED TO LISTEN TO, BELIEVE, AND APPROPRIATELY TREAT THEIR PATIENT. THEY WERE CALLOUS, ABUSIVE, AND NEGLIGENT. THEIR ACTIONS WERE NO LESS THAN MALPRACTICE AND, IN MY OPINION, MURDER. AND THE SCARIEST THING IS, CARLE'S DOCTORS DO THE SAME THING EVERY DAY, ALL DAY, WITH ALMOST EVERY PATIENT. BASED ON MY OWN EXPERIENCE, CHARL'S TREATMENT WAS THE APPALLING NORM, RATHER THAN A REGRETTABLE EXCEPTION.

I don't care what kind of cancer Charl had, how fast acting it was, how difficult to diagnose, or about any other "mitigating factors." A gentle, generous human being -- a woman who was HURTING -- was not given the respect and dignity of being believed and appropriately treated when she repeatedly told doctors she was in pain. That woman is now dead after suffering a death confirmed after the fact to have been an excruciatingly painful one. The doctors who had the power to make her life a whole lot better, and maybe little bit longer, are all walking around as if nothing has happened, and that makes me terribly angry.

Most people are terrified of getting cancer. Imagine having end stage cancer and being unable to get even a Tylenol #3. That's what happened to Charl Krauss.

It's unconscionable.

At Carle Clinic, it's standard operating procedure.

About the Internet and Copyright Law (originally posted on CraftGossip 6/5/07)

2007-06-07T02:55:00.000-05:00

Commenting on this post, a reader wrote:

Just because you wrote some thing doesn’t mean it’s copyrighted. You have to file for a copyright through the Library of Congress and have a copyright number for there to be any copyright infringement.

I hope your legal team tells you that.

This reader is wrong, of course. If she were a lawyer or had asked her own legal team, they would have told her so in order that she not come across as misinformed.

As I explained:

You are incorrect. According to the US Copyright Office, copyright exists from the moment the work is created. Registration is recommended, but not required. Additionally, expect to see the recommendation for registration to change due to the Internet. The world is a different place now, and the laws must change right along with it. But the definition of what is theft will NOT change.

Copyright law has been the way it is now for some time.

Back when I finally finished writing my master's thesis in 1998, I did not have to file for a Certificate of Registration in order for my thesis to be copyrighted. In fact, all the time I had been writing my thesis (I started writing in ... 1992), even before it was finished, even before it was published, even before it was read by any of my professors, even before it was read by any other individual at all, it was copyrighted. That's because copyright covers unpublished works as well as published ones.

If I keep a diary intended for no one's eyes but mine, it is copyrighted, and I own the copyright.

I DID file for that Certificate of Registration on my master's thesis, though, just because I wanted the nice piece of paper from the Library of Congress. I'll admit I was more easily convinced to part with the registration fee because, should I ever need to go to court if someone steals my original work and claims it as their own, I wanted that piece of paper as proof. That will make the court case EASIER, but it wasn't REQUIRED. The copyright always existed, it always belonged to ME, and anyone who might try to pass off my work as their own is STEALING.

By the way, it sure is a good thing copyright exists from the time the work is created. Here is a story about red tape. I mailed my application and the required fees in April of 1998. I finally received my Certificate of Registration from the Library of Congress in March of 2000 -- and the Effective Date of Registration is stamped January 14, 1999. So the Library of Congress wasn't all that behind in processing the Certificate of Registration, but they were well over a year behind in mailing their outgoing mail.

Can you imagine the implications to the needlework industry if copyright weren't actually in effect the whole time? My, my, that could present quite a conundrum, couldn't it? Imagine all the unhappy needlework designers unable to release their new designs until they finally received their Certificates of Registration ... Think of all the shops who would have no new designs coming in to offer their customers ... All of us stitchers would have nothing new to tickle our fancies. Good grief, we might all have to stop with the retail therapy! We might actually be stuck with just stitching!! Or, gulp, even stuck doing something else, like reading, or sleeping, or WORKING!!! It gives me nightmares just thinking about it. Thank goodness for copyright. Whew!

So, yes, everything I write is copyrighted from the second I write it. Period. It's the law. Buckle up, be grateful, and keep your hands inside the car at all times. Thank you, and enjoy the ride!

Ethics and the Needlework Industry (originally posted on CraftGossip 6/5/07)

2007-06-07T02:49:00.000-05:00

Linn Skinner has an interesting post on her blog about what needlework designers get paid for teaching. Be forewarned, though, if you're a needlework instructor but Linn doesn't think you're in her rank (and I agree: few are), you may well be offended.

Anyway, the reason I mention her post is because I find it very strange: Her description of how a needlework instructor's fees are handled for a consumer show, of which the National Counted Cross Stitch Show is an example, is not at all in agreement with what she said just a few short weeks ago in writing to Butch Phillips and me when I was the Show Director for the NCCSS.

In fact, her post seems purposely directed as a personal attack on Maggie Pringlemeir in response to Maggie's comments about how poorly her own contract negotations with Rockome Gardens were handled by Butch Phillips.

As an aside, Maggie's contract with Rockome was not necessarily going to be the same as Linn's, nor was that any of Linn's business. Individual interests are the point of contract negotiation. Maggie had needs she stated upfront which had to be met before she could or would sign a contract with Rockome, and as Butch Phillips never bothered to contact her, a contract was never signed. The verbal promises Butch directed me to make on his behalf to Maggie will never be tested because Maggie chose to listen to and trust me, instead of trying to "shoot the messenger" as so many others have. Maggie recognized that since Butch had already renegged on every promise he'd made to me, he couldn't be trusted to keep any of those he'd made to her, and ESPECIALLY since he hadn't even bothered to make them directly to her HIMSELF but had instead used me as his surrogate.

Back to Linn ... What she said then was this:

Rockome gets instructors at a discount rate.

I will be teaching in Kansas City the weekend after Rockome and my usual fees prevail there. I am compensated for air travel, shuttles to and from all airports, lodging and meals, kit costs and $100.00 per student for a 6 hour session. I do not pay for use of a facility and I require a minimum of 12 students for a booking.

At Rockome I will be teaching 7 hours per day on two days, provide a kit at my expense ($35.00 wholesale cost), pay for my own travel, lodging and meal expenses and will be paid $75.00 leaving me a very small profit. I have agreed to teach the class with no minimum as to attendees.

I accept this as a marketing expense and hope to make up the difference with sales in my booth.

So, which is it? Is the NCCSS getting needlework instructors at a discount or not? Why has Linn's explanation of how these fees are handled at a consumer show changed so dramatically in such a short period of time? Is Linn grinding an axe of her own, or are there other people at work on other issues behind the scenes at the NCCSS? Or both?

There is a far bigger discussion these questions should lead us to ... a discussion about why so many people say needlework, and cross stitch in particular, is "not doing well" right now. I have plenty of my own thoughts on that larger discussion, as I expect you do also. I would love to hear your thoughts ... and I'm even going to give you a chance to post them before I post my own. :) Let's get some discussion going here.

I think these types of questions and their answers are very relevant to the needlework industry -- and very important to its future. There are people watching how all of this plays out who are just as disappointed and heartbroken as I am at the lack of honesty and ethics in this industry. We have known about it for a long time, and we have chosen to overlook it, but that choice is no longer possible. Today more than ever before, people want to spend their money with people and organizations whose overall ethics (and agenda) they agree with, believe in, and support. And there are certainly enough choices today and enough opportunities, especially with the Internet, that customers can not only find an agreeable choice, but also do the necessary research to determine which of the available choices is the option that best matches their own requirements.

The world has been changing around the needlework industry for a long time now, and in my opinion, it's long past time that the needlework industry get with the program, clean up its act, and stop treating its customers like we're stupid -- because we most definitely are NOT stupid.

A Charlatan Exposed (originally posted on CraftGossip 6/3/07)

2007-06-07T02:46:00.000-05:00

It took Butch Phillips over seven weeks to put a link to CraftGossip on Rockome's website with regard to all the work I was doing for the National Counted Cross Stitch Show (NCCSS). He kept saying his "web guy" had so many other things to do that putting up one link, which would have taken about thirty seconds, just wasn't on Mr. Phillips' list of priorities.

However, Mr. Phillips has managed to remove that link after only a bit over a week has passed. Don't you think this proves he could have put UP the link a lot faster than he did?

By the way, putting up that link to me on CraftGossip was part of my initial payment agreement with him. Because he'd renegged on ALL of that payment agreement, I had stopped working for him by the time he finally did get around to putting up that link. He has yet to come through on any of the other elements of our payment agreement, and, of course, there is no way to calculate the amount of traffic and revenue I lost by his not linking to me much earlier as he should have done.

Meanwhile, all the work I did for him remains intact and online on CraftGossip, and stitchers continue to visit that information. I hear that enrollment in classes and Country Evenings is up to 200 individual students -- and that's thanks to the hard work and long hours I put in ... But I'm not asking for thanks; I'M DEMANDING THE PAYCHECK TO WHICH I'M ENTITLED.

I still haven't received it. I'll let you know if and when I ever do, and what had to be done to get it. My complaints to the Illinois Department of Labor (IDOL) for non-payment of wages, as well as for not being paid even minimum wage or overtime wages as the law requires, were mailed last week. The laws IDOL enforces will require that I be paid significantly more than Mr. Phillips and I had originally agreed to, so he would have done well to have just paid me back when he was supposed to, or at least when I first began asking for it.

Copyright Violations -- One Example (originally posted on CraftGossip 6/2/07)

2007-06-07T02:35:00.000-05:00

As you all know, I was the Show Director for the Rockome Gardens' National Counted Cross Stitch Show (NCCSS) from 4/7/07 through 5/30/07. Because the management and owners of Rockome Gardens refused to pay me for work performed, I resigned from that position.

I am the Needlework Editor on the Needlework Blog on CraftGossip.

Since 4/7/07, I posted numerous items on CraftGossip related to the NCCSS, including detailed NCCSS class descriptions.

I have contacted Yahoo to remove the YahooGroup located here because my copyright has been violated by Adana Adams. Every last one of the NCCSS class descriptions I wrote and put on my CraftGossip blog has been copied word for word and put into Word format on that YahooGroup by Ms. Adams.

The original class descriptions I wrote are all easily accessed here.

I am the author of the unquoted portion of each of these documents, and that content belongs solely to me.

With Rockome Gardens Mayor Butch Phillips' permisson, I quoted from the 2007 NCCSS Show Book; that content, of course, belongs to Rockome Gardens and the NCCSS.

CraftGossip is the only location on the Internet where all NCCSS information is supposed to be available with the possible exception of Rockome's website. Rockome's website is linking to my CraftGossip blog even now after I am no longer the NCCSS Show Director partly because this is the only site where that information is available to the public, and partly because their linking to my CraftGossip blog was part of the original payment terms of my contract for working for the NCCSS.

The pictures belong to the individual designers whose classes are being advertised.

At no time has anyone asked for permission to use MY writing on the YahooGroup Rockome_NCCSS, and I have not even been credited for it.

I first became aware of these multiple copyright violations through this message posted by Adana Adams, who is a moderator in that group, and who has violated my copyright in the past such that I have learned to keep tabs on her:

From: adana69

To: Rockome_NCCSS@yahoogroups.com

Sent: Wednesday, May 30, 2007 11:26 AM

Subject: [SPAM] [Rockome_NCCSS] Re: I created albums for each teacher....

Thanks Cindy for all the work you've done on the site to get it up to speed. Let me know if I can help you in any way.

I worked into the night uploading, downloading, formatting and inviting stitchers to the group and see this morning that several have come onboard. WELCOME!

This morning I uploaded class pictures in the photo section of the site for some of the instructors. If I didn't do your section and you would like me to, please contact me. If I did your section and you're not happy with it, please feel free to delete what I've done or ask me and I will.

I've also put all the class info with pictures (from another site) into word documents and uploaded those to the file section. Again I've only done certain instructors (please don't read too much into this as I'm willing to do more but only if asked).

Also in the FILES section you'll find the forms needed to enter under 2007 ENTRY FORMS along with other misc information. I'd like to thank Butch for his efforts in getting this site up and running and for the access he has given myself and others.

Adana
adana69 (at) yahoo.com

In her message, Ms. Adams says: "I've also put all the class info with pictures (from another site) into Word documents and uploaded those to the file section." Her words, "(from another site)" are the only credit she gives me for the work I did in authoring those documents; this is NOT proper credit. Furthermore, Ms. Adams never requested my permission to use the work I created in this way.

I do not now, nor will I ever give permission for MY writing to be used on the Rockome_NCCSS YahooGroup by Ms. Adams or anyone else ... or anywhere else by Ms. Adams.

Just to be clear, please compare Ms. Adams' document titled "MARY KNAPP.doc" with the corresponding post I made on CraftGossip. Please skip down to the second class, Night Fire. “Fire up with this 4-way Bargello using warm colors and beads. A bright star in the dark night you create with silk floss on black congress cloth ... ” is in quotes, as I put it in quotes while typing it because it is from the 2007 NCCSS Show book.

However, the text which follows shortly afterward is NOT in quotes because it is my own writing. It is MY copyrighted writing, and this can be proven by the fact that my inadvertent spelling error wasn't even corrected by Ms. Adams ("simply" should have been "simple"):

Isn’t this simply beauty just lovely? I think it would make a lovely holiday piece if you didn’t want to hang it up year-round, and it really looks like there isn’t all that much stitching to be done … So if the black seems intimidating to you, don’t let that get to you. Give this one a try; I bet you won’t be sorry!

Every last one of the files Adana Adams put up on the Rockome_NCCSS YahooGroup describing the classes being offered at the NCCSS is a copyright violation of my writing on CraftGossip. By doing so, she has not only stolen my work, but she has also stolen potential readers -- equating to potential dollars -- out of my pocket.

I have already made appropriate legal contacts to protect my copyrights.

Caveat Emptor re: NCCSS (originally posted on CraftGossip 5/30/07)

2007-06-07T02:32:00.000-05:00

I regret to announce I have not been paid once cent by Rockome Gardens for the work I have done. Sadly, it has become clear this matter will not be resolved except through legal channels. Therefore, I am resigning from Rockome Gardens and the National Counted Cross Stitch Show, effective immediately, and cannot currently endorse the NCCSS as I had previously.

I certainly hope it is not the case, but based on my own experience, I don’t believe the teachers will be paid by Rockome Gardens either. However, at this point, it does appear all the teachers are still planning on showing up at the venue; they feel an obligation to the stitchers who have signed up for classes and Country Evenings. As of the last count I was given, it was shaping up to be a very good year, with class enrollment almost quadrupled in a week and a half.

As far as I am aware, stitchers to whom refunds are already due have not received them, although Angie Miller is not behind on paperwork (as Butch Phillips had told me to say she was if anyone asked ... ). Again, I hope it is not the case, but I have no reason to believe such refunds will be issued.

The competition awards are also significantly under-sponsored as of today's date. I have serious doubts that Rockome Gardens will be able to come up with the nearly $7500 in sponsorships needed for those awards in the fifteen days which remain before the show begins.

I've already heard plenty of criticism about being truthful regarding this experience. I based my decision to come forward on the fact that teachers and stitchers who might find themselves out money in a few weeks time would have had good reason to be upset with me for NOT informing them I thought there was a problem earlier, especially if I could have saved them from losing any additional money they might not have spent in the interim. That people like to shoot the messenger is certainly true. :( I believe I had an ethical and legal obligation to make this information public. I did so only after numerous attempts to work privately with Butch Phillips to obtain my paycheck over a period of three weeks, and then following several more days of trying to obtain my paycheck after making the designers involved with the NCCSS aware of the situation. If you think my making this public is unprofessional, I remind you that when I started working on the NCCSS I promised to communicate with everyone -- and no matter what, to tell you the truth. I have done exactly that even when it has most definitely not been beneficial to me -- and those kinds of ethics are what define a professional -- and a reporter.

He Called Me Twinkle, and I Loved Him

2007-05-28T15:31:00.000-05:00

Today, Memorial Day, I honor a very special man. He is one of America's great veterans who willingly gave up his life to protect the many freedoms we hold dear and a way of life we too often take for granted.

EDWARD JOHN PRINGLEMEIR

Loving Husband,
Devoted Father,
Professional Realtor,
Motivational Instructor,
Ordained Minister,
Community Supporter,
Rugged Patriot,
Proud Marine,
Loyal Friend

This was my eulogy for him:

Although I knew Maggie online through a cross stitch list for several years, it was actually Edward I met first in person. I don't recall if Maggie was indisposed at the time or out running a quick errand, but I remember feeling awkward -- though only for a very short time. Edward introduced himself and I offered my hand to shake his. He said, "We don't shake hands here. We hug." That was Edward.

When my husband proposed to me and I called to tell Maggie and Edward my happy news, Edward was the first to answer the phone. He asked me one question: "What makes this man good enough for you?" I said, "He looks at me the way you look at Maggie." His response to that was, "That's good enough for me," and he turned the phone over to Maggie. That was Edward.

Depending on what time of day I would call, Edward would always answer the phone with a cheerful, "Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening! How may I help you?" (With me, it was usually evening. ;>) I always thought this was just one of Edward's charms. It was only when I mentioned how much I missed this to Maggie a week or so after he died in her arms that she told me he did this because computer calls are programmed to respond to, "Hello," so he avoided saying that word when he answered the phone. Still, I find it charming and miss hearing his greeting. That was Edward.

I sent an email to Maggie venting and seeking advice about a disagreement I was having with my husband once. Then I turned around and sent the same email to Edward, and I asked him for his opinion, too. He was honored to be asked. His advice was sound -- of course, Edward agreed with Maggie, so the advice couldn't have been anything other than good advice. ;>) That was Edward.

He was a husband, father, and grandfather who loved his family unconditionally. He was a dear friend who considered his friends his family. He was a Marine and a patriot. He was a real estate agent. He was very supportive of Maggie's craft interests (cross stitching, crazy quilting, knitting, and so on), and helped her run a small craft-related business. He was very involved in volunteer work with his local police force. He and Maggie officiated many, many weddings together -- passing on their own blessings to many other couples. He loved each of these roles and took great pride in them. That was Edward.

He had rosy cheeks, a robust laugh, a big smile, a full white beard, a zest for life, and just the right nose -- the picture of Santa Claus. One of my favorite pictures of him -- all dressed up and ready to officiate a wedding with Maggie is above -- Maggie made those clothes, by the way.

He was not a wealthy or a healthy man (at least, not by the time he came into my life), and yet he still gave so much, and he did so with great relish and energy. He found joy in every day and shared it widely.

If he were here, he would probably share some sage advice and funny stories. He would want to hear laughter, not tears. He would wrap everyone in hugs. He would show sincere interest in and respect for each person and be overjoyed to see them. He would proudly show off the pair of socks Maggie knit for him. He would dance with her. He would bring joy to his own "party."

I wish I could think of a joke or a funny story Edward might share. Actually, I can think of several, but none that seem quite appropriate -- and Edward would probably wink at me and chuckle for feeling that way.

He will be deeply missed by many. The police station's training room will be very full today. Even though I am not physically there, I am honored to be among the very large group of people who were blessed to know Edward.

Merry part, Edward ... until we merry meet again.

EDWARD JOHN PRINGLEMEIR

Born July 11, 1941

Livonia, MI

Died June 29, 2004

Novi, MI

Edward Pringlemeir was killed on American soil on June 29, 2004 -- the victim of medical malpractice and manslaughter (according to the Military Code of Justice) committed by a Full Colonel in the Naval Reserve at the VA Hospital in Ann Arbor, Michigan. That Full Colonel, Dr. William Barrie, refused to renew a prescription for Plavix, a medication which prevents blood clots. Just as predicted by the pharmaceutical manufacturer for patients needing Plavix who are removed from it abruptly, exactly five days after being removed from this medication, Edward Pringlemeir suffered a massive heart attack and died at home in his wife's arms.

In Michigan, the law requires an autopsy unless the physician of record signs a death certificate stating the deceased died from natural causes. Dr. Barrie was also Edward Pringlemeir's physician of record -- and readily agreed, covering up his own culpability. This was a clear conflict of interest.

Another obvious conflict of interest is the fact that Dr. Barrie was also the head of the committee to cut VA pharmaceutical costs. I believe this is the real reason he took Edward off Plavix, which at that time was a non-formulary drug.

Three lawyers refused to accept the case because it means going up against the VA and because there was no autopsy done.

Today, nearly three years later, the Veteran's Administration still refuses to acknowledge culpability, has repeatedly denied Maggie Pringlemeir's claim for disability and indemnity compensation, and has left her a destitute, dangerously desperate, and still very much grieving widow.

Her perfectly good car was literally stolen from her -- towed away as an eyesore because she could no longer afford either the monthly insurance or the annual vehicle registration costs -- by the mobile home community in which she rents a space for nearly $600 per month. She hardly survives on her own disability check, food stamps, contributions of food and payments of her utilities by her local church (whom she dares not tell she is not Christian, not even in this country, with its supposed freedom of religion), and an over-reliance on the few friends she has left to provide her with the transportation she regularly requires after alienating all the rest in fits of anger (lashing out at and blaming all of us who care most about her for the fact that nothing in her life seems to go right since the loss of her beloved husband). She is actively seeking her next husband on the Internet but keeps falling victim to married men -- and worse (yes, it is actually possible) -- who are only interested in taking advantage of her. Her chat transcripts are obvious evidence that her all-too-ready offers of online sex (with the promise of more) are largely the reason she is being victimized by entirely the opposite kind of man than Edward was or would ever have hoped she'd find. Her emotional state has become very precarious and I can only hope her remaining friends will somehow succeed in helping her through these terrible crises.

Eight Random Things about Me

2007-05-20T03:58:00.000-05:00

I was tagged by Patti a while ago ...

The rules are as follows:

Each person writes eight random facts/habits about him- or herself and posts it to his or her blog, along with these rules.
At the end of his or her post, each blogger tags eight people and posts their names. (Don’t forget to leave each newly tagged person a comment telling them they’re tagged, and asking them to read your blog for more information.)

Eight Random Things about Me:

I've read a lot of "Six Weird Things About Me" lists and have discovered that, no matter who you are, you and I have in common at least one item on your list. As far as I know, no one tagged me, and that's probably good because apparently I'm very weird; it's probably a list nobody should see, LOL!
I've lived in Alabama, California, Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Michigan, Missouri, New Jersey, and Ohio, and I've moved everything I own a total of 24 times so far in my life. One of my biggest pet peeves is the saying which goes, "If you don't like the weather in [insert state name], wait ten minutes and it will change," because people everywhere say it (and it's rarely true). For the record, New Jersey has the weirdest weather I've ever seen -- it was not unusual for me to wake up to five inches of snow, while there was nothing at all on the ground 20 miles east.
I have always hated my first name (I'm not at all attached to my middle name either) and have seriously contemplated legally changing it. So far, I've decided not to mostly because I'm afraid it might jinx my marriage vows and also because changing my last name after marriage was such a pain in the behind. Another problem is I have no idea what name I'd choose for myself; I've always felt rather identity-less, still do, and probably always will.
I live my life by the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Like every other human being, I have bad moods and make mistakes, so I make a habit of analyzing my actions and am quick to apologize whenever I should. It takes quite a lot to get on my bad side because I'm more willing than most people to forgive, give others "the benefit of the doubt," and believe in second chances, so if and when I finally get pushed to the point of dishing out to someone exactly what they've been repeatedly asking for, they get exactly what they deserve.
I've watched only two seasons of American Idol -- the second one and the current one. I still have a huge crush on Clay Aiken. My pick for this year has been Jordin Sparks from the start. I haven't really cared for Blake Lewis all season, which is more a matter of my not really liking the beat-boxing style than anything else. However, I LOVED his version of Bon Jovi's You Give Love A Bad Name (one of my favorite Bon Jovi songs, so this is very high praise from me). The judge I'm most like is Simon Cowell, and the proof is that I'm not afraid to say so. I call things the way I see them. I'll certainly try to be more tactful than Simon usually is, which is in accordance with #4 above, but when that doesn't get the job accomplished, I'll say what needs to be said.
I've lived through two of the US's most expensive hurricanes (Frederick and Floyd), two earthquakes, been hit once by lightning, had my house and everything connected to the phone lines taken out by another lightning strike, and had a tornado take down a tree in our back yard which just missed our house (and the brand new siding we'd installed, along with more still laying on the ground waiting to be installed) AND the neighbor's house both by about half an inch.
Everything but the second lightning strike and the tornado occurred BEFORE I broke a mirror I did NOT touch on my wedding day nearly five years ago.
I don't know how I ever managed to live without being able to hear the sound of a purr every day. To me, there is no sound more comforting; it is the sound of home, and of love. It is what gets me through all the difficult moments -- and especially through being Clueless. It's also the one thing guaranteed to put a smile on my face. It is no wonder I felt identity-less in a family of cat-haters, and yet cats are drawn to me as if I wear catnip perfume. I snuggle my eight precious blessings every day, and often the neighbor's cat, too, who comes over of his own accord regularly and would gladly stay if I didn't send him back to the other people he owns.

I've never been much of a tagger-type. I'll answer these types of emails, but I only send them back to the person who sent them to me; I don't forward them on to others. I guess I'm the same way when it comes to blogs. So if you haven't been tagged (or even if you have and just want to do this one again, LOL) and want to play, please go ahead. Please come back and leave me a comment letting me know to read your blog after you've put up your post because I'd love to read it!

Why I Have (Almost) No Faith in Doctors in My Area

2007-05-06T06:05:00.000-05:00

I could write ad nauseam on this subject. In fact, I have. I have plenty of friends who've received the emails over the last five years, and some of them probably still have them to prove it.

I have also written my Congressman. Multiple times. His office has always responded, been polite, tried to help by making a handful of phone calls, but ultimately been of absolutely no help whatsoever. Not his fault; it's the system that's the problem.

I've also written all three of my Senators -- so glad the useless Fitzgerald retired; sadly, I must report Obama didn't bother to respond; to be fair, neither did Durbin (but Durbin's not running for President* now, either). For kicks, I even wrote to President Bush (you really didn't think he would respond, did you?). Also to Senator Clinton (nope, she's not really concerned about health care ... OR women's health care in particular ... just talking out the side of her mouth like politicians are wont to do), Senator Kerry (not from him either, though he was busy with the Presidential race and all ... ), numerous local and not-so-local newspapers and television news organizations (apparently, I haven't hit them on a slow enough news day yet, and postage is going up again ... along with gas prices, so I'm running out of money to continue going to my incessant doctor's appointments as it is, especially while continuing to fill my I-can't-count-that-high-with-just-two-hands number of prescriptions sent to me by mail).

Anyway, what's on my mind at the moment is the lump in my breast. I found it a little over a month ago. It worried me for a number of reasons.

Before I start, I should mention that for a year in graduate school I was a model patient for medical students for breast exams and pelvic exams for both the MD and the OD schools of medicine at Michigan State University. That means I've been paid $25 an hour to get naked in front of a bunch of pretty terrified medical students in order to assist their supervising doctors/professors in teaching them how to appropriately examine a female patient in a clinical environment. That means, looking back, that I was being recognized as the expert in the room -- as the expert at least on my own body, and to some degree as the expert on female bodies in general -- among a group of soon-to-be-doctors and at least one already-fully-qualified physician. I had no idea then, just how lucky I was to have that experience -- just how rare an opportunity it was. The best and most surprising thing about the experience, though, was how much I learned about my own body -- including plenty I had no idea I didn't already know, much less that I might be very glad to know it later. For instance, from then on, I've known when a gynecologist is able to locate my "shy" ovary or not; many just pretend to, thinking I have no idea. Fools. I'm here to tell you, ladies, that most of the gynecologists out there -- male or female -- are NOT regularly examining both of your ovaries because they have trouble finding at least one of them.

Now back to the lump. As soon as I found it, I knew it was different from the usual fibrous cysts my breasts are full of; these feel like hundreds of BBs. What I found was a different shape and size -- long and more uniform, a bit like a snow pea. I immediately looked for a matching lump in my other breast because if there were a matching lump, then there would be less reason for worry. No match. I noted that while all my usual BB-like lumps hurt (they always do; fibrocystic breasts suck), this lump does not hurt -- at all. Another potentially bad sign. I definitely knew I needed to have this lump checked out further by a qualified doctor.

Well, my annual exam was already scheduled for a week or so later, so I just waited. I decided not to mention the lump to my doctor. I wanted to see if he found it first himself before I mentioned it, as that would let me know, too, whether or not to worry. He found it immediately. He looked for a matching lump and found none. We chatted about it, and I told him I'd just found it about a week before in my regular monthly breast exam, explained how it felt to me to make sure he and I were talking about the same thing, and he said he thinks it feels cystic (which usually means benign), but he wanted me to have a mammogram and see a surgeon for a second opinion to be safe.

This is all still fine and just the way things should be. My primary care physician is an excellent doctor, so I gladly drive an hour each way to see him. It took me over three years to find him, though.

But oh, what I had to suffer through first! I had already been "terminated" by another doctor (Robert A. Brown, OB-GYN in Champaign-Urbana, Illinois) who was so offended when I refused to take a medication he prescribed for endometriosis (Lupron) because I read on the manufacturer's website that Lupron was NOT recommended for people with certain other health issues, one of which I had, that not only did he terminate me, but he convinced an entire full-service clinic (Christie Clinic) to do so as well. Dr. Brown was in the process of joining Christie Clinic, but then did not actually join them ... But he somehow convinced a clinic which he was never a part of, is not a part of, and has no plans to become a part of to terminate one of their current patients whom he didn't want as a patient. I had numerous doctors I saw regularly at Christie Clinic, and by regularly, I mean weekly in some cases. I'd been seeing doctors at Christie Clinic for two years and had long-established relationships with my physicians; not one doctor, to my knowledge, had ever made a complaint about me prior to Dr. Brown's ridiculous complaint. Yet suddenly, based only on the word of a doctor who had -- and still has! -- no connection whatsoever to Christie Clinic, without interviewing or warning me in any way, all my healthcare was suddenly terminated. I was notified by mail that my care with Christie Clinic was terminated. Period. I was not able to communicate with any of my now-previous physicians about the situation. I was not even ALLOWED to appeal the situation with Christie Clinic. Christie Clinic had decided to terminate me, their decision was final, and I was out of luck. I was without all health care whatsoever. It did not matter that I had insurance of any sort (my insurance covered THAT full-service clinic and no other). It did not matter that I had not only NOT done anything wrong, but in fact, had done EXACTLY what I am supposed to do: I had double-checked to make sure that a medication which had been prescribed for me was safe for me to take. And because I had done MY job as a conscientious patient, which may very well have saved my LIFE, I suddenly had no medical care at all! And furthermore, I had NO RIGHTS to fight that decision! It is now some three to four years later, and the situation with Christie Clinic remains unchanged. None of their doctors are ALLOWED to see me because I was "terminated clinic-wide." HOW IS ANY OF THIS EVEN LEGAL?

It is legal, though. I sent a complaint to the Illinois Department of Professional Regulation, and they sent an investigator (Steve Wagy) who drove four hours round-trip to my house from Springfield, Illinois in the pouring rain to YELL AT ME to drop the complaint! He told me any doctor can refuse to treat any patient for any reason INCLUDING THE COLOR OF YOUR SKIN, THE SMELL OF YOUR COLOGNE, and a bunch of other ridiculous bigotry I can't believe is legal but apparently is. That's what we get for OUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK?

We've changed insurance companies several times, and they've tried to remedy the situation. Blue Cross/Blue Shield wasn't able to change anything with Christie Clinic with respect to my case, even though Christie Clinic is in violation of their contracts with BC/BS as far as denying me care. Currently, we are with Aetna and working on the same battle ... It's not even about whether I WANT to go to Christie Clinic at all; it's about what's right and what's NOT right. It's about principles. And if I can't get things fixed by going through the appropriate channels, then I can at least use my freedom of speech to say something about what's happened to me, to say that it's WRONG, and to say that it should not EVER happen to anyone else.

Sorry, I got sidetracked again. The problems with the medical community in my area make me so irate I do that a lot. Anyway, back to the lump. So my doctor ordered a mammogram and referred me to a surgeon.

I went for the mammogram, which was the usual -- squashed like a pancake (and COLD!) and not even offered my choice of syrup (I like blueberry or blackberry). The mammography technician could feel the lump, which is basically in the crease where my underwire would run ... not an easy spot to get on a mammogram. She marked the spot with a little sticker and tried several times, making me feel palpably more sore each time, but was unable to get that sticker to show up on the mammogram. The technician commented that I was able to tolerate the pressure very well; I replied that I could handle whatever she needed to do for a few seconds in order to protect my health -- also, I knew I would be feeling it the next day a lot more. She took the x-rays she got over to a radiologist, returned, and told me the mammogram was abnormal, so I'm immediately sent, carrying a paper clearly marked, "Mammogram-Abnormal," over for an ultrasound.

The ultrasound technicians (there were two) could also feel the lump. They were far gentler than any mammography machine could ever be. After having numerous ultrasounds on my ovaries for endometriosis and on my kidneys for kidney stones, I have found ultrasounds to be very painful in the past, but these two women were both supremely gentle, and I actually relaxed. They took numerous ultrasound pictures of the lump and both said they didn't see anything that looked to them like anything other than "normal breast tissue," but of course, they cautioned me, the radiologist and the surgeon would have to look at the pictures and reports.

A couple of days later, feeling completely out of proportion with my own body -- I mean it felt like my breasts had turned into bowling balls they hurt so badly, and whenever I wasn't in public I was walking around holding them up with my hands -- I went to my follow-up appointment with the surgeon. He told me the mammogram was normal. This was news to me, and I questioned him about that. "Nothing to worry about," he said. "Just a quick way to get you into ultrasound to look at a difficult area to view on mammography." So are you saying that the mammogram didn't show the lump in question? "Yes, that's a good way of putting it ... God was ... very generous with you." (Gee, thanks, and actually, I've always wanted to look into a breast reduction, but I suppose now is not the best time ... I have a feeling it might confuse him.)

Okay ... Now what about the ultrasound? "Well, I can't see anything on the ultrasound either." I asked what he meant by that ... Is the ultrasound not showing anything to worry about in the spot where the lump is? Or is the ultrasound giving a similar problem providing information on a lump in that particular area like the mammogram is? He hemmed and hawed a little but finally got around to, "This lump is in a really difficult area, and it is not showing up on mammograms or ultrasounds."

Fine, so the next step is a biopsy then, right? "Well, no, we don't want to hack you up needlessly." Uh ... well, I don't consider finding and removing a potentially malignant tumor to be 'needless hacking.' "Well, you see, if we can't see the lump on a screen, we can't biopsy it."

??? This next paragraph occurred only in my thoughts: Okay, now I'm stumped ... Am I a video game? It seems to me that since the lump is palpable by all who've tried to feel it, then it should be simple enough to LOOK AT IT WITH YOUR EYES as you pinch it between the thumb and forefingers of one hand while taking aim at it using whatever tool is appropriate with which to take a biopsy in the opposite hand. Apparently, this technique is now so far from the pinnacle of modern medical expertise that it isn't DONE ... or something. I decide to say nothing for the time being, having already established such an impressive termination record with doctors in this area.

Okay, then, what do we do? "Well, I don't think we need to do anything. I'm pretty sure it's a benign cyst. Most lumps in the breasts are." Yes, I know all the statistics, but if we all listened to those, none of us would have the lumps we find checked out, so why is that a good enough reason for me to not worry just because you're quoting the statistics to me? "Well, the area this is in, this could be a pimple, like from an ingrown hair."

??? More thoughts I kept to myself: Remember when I said this lump was about the size of a snow pea? That's pretty big. If it were a pimple, it would hurt. A LOT. Regardless of what were causing it. It doesn't hurt. At all. I'm not buying the pimple idea. Benign cyst I can buy ... I just want someone to give me solid proof, that's all. And I am NOT asking for too much in demanding that.

The surgeon encourages me to continue monitoring the lump and having annual mammograms (I haven't reached age 40 yet, so I've not yet started my annual mammograms ... this is my second one, though, after finding an odd lump ... the first one disappeared on its own) and to consult him "next year" if needed. He "reassure[d]" me that he "really didn't think this was anything to worry about, although [he] can't guarantee it." No, of course he can't -- that's why he's not paying me $25 an hour anymore to sit in front of him and eight to ten freaked out medical students. Now, it's practice, and I'm supposed to trust him as the expert -- and if I challenge his expertise, he might "terminate" me. Then, it was teaching, and I was one of the experts in the room.

It's not that I'm actually all that concerned that this lump is anything to worry about ... But how the heck is this kind of reaction called "early detection"? What if by "next year," this lump is stage 2, or 3, or 4 of something that could have been taken care of minimally invasively right now?

How many other women get the same kind of response I did ... and then die because of it? Even if I'm not one of them, this worries me. It isn't right. It shouldn't be happening.

When I live in an area where a multi-million (or is it multi-billion?) -dollar breast cancer center is being built, and the best answer I can get is "we don't want to hack into you needlessly," from a doctor incapable of doing a simple biopsy the "old-fashioned" way, I'm a bit concerned all that money contributed by some generous donor is being severely mis-spent.

Because my father-in-law was diagnosed with lung cancer in late November or early December (and has somehow miraculously ended up being one of the few lucky ones whom even his own doctors are calling "cured," but of course we all had our share of scares and tears along the way), I want my husband and his family to hear the words, "her biopsy came back benign." I've been trying to keep my husband out of this whole thing, barely mentioning at all that I found a lump, or that my doctor found it, too, or that I had a mammogram, and so on, because I knew he would be panicked. And he is ... and I have nothing to reassure him with other than, "Well, if they can't see it on a screen, they can't biopsy it." (Good grief ... how do people get pregnant in this day and age with thinking like that anyway? Or did Bush miss the boat on a form of birth control that could actually be effective?) Meanwhile, I haven't told any of my husband's family, or my own family either -- but why should I have to go through this alone? And now I'm stuck in something tantamount to limbo alone as well? Nope, that's just not a good enough answer for me.

I understand the size of my bosom has complicated the initial testing procedures; in fact, I suspected this would be a problem in the mammogram in the first place. However, this in no way makes the next step any less important.

Regardless of the fact that our world has become so reliant on technology and video games, it's intolerable for a surgeon to no longer know how to do a simple biopsy without the aid of a monitor and a joystick, a computer mouse, or some other technological equivalent. The fact is, I could do this biopsy in my own home with the help of an assistant who isn't afraid of needles; a syringe; and a lab technician willing, knowledgeable, and qualified to examine the sample. And my PCP's office will be hearing from me tomorrow about scheduling with a doctor who IS capable of doing a proper biopsy. It's my right to be able to do that much to protect my health NOW -- not after this lump gets big enough to reach a techno-reliant surgeon's radar screen.

(And if my PCP's not willing to listen ... Well then I'll be soliciting cross stitching friends -- because none of you are afraid of a needle like my poor 6'6" husband is -- and we'll manage to biopsy the darned thing ourselves. I surprised myself by getting a tattoo recently; I'm sure I can tolerate the pain of an unanesthetized biopsy. All I'll need then is a lab analyst. I bet there's a cross stitcher out there who does that for a living somewhere, too!)

*For the record, right now I'm trying to decide between Edwards (whom I did not think to write to previously; perhaps I will now) and Obama. What can I say -- they're both HOT! Actually, I really mean that (well, they are both HOT, too); they are the two current Democratic candidates by whom I'm most impressed at this point. There are things I like about Hillary (but she's not HOT, although I am liking her hairstyle lately) -- but the thing I've always liked best about Hillary is her husband (pretty HOT), and even had he always been a more faithful example of a husband than he has been, liking the spouse is not a good enough reason to choose the candidate.

I'm Really Proud ...

2007-04-30T09:51:00.000-05:00

of this.

Now I Can't Stitch ...

2007-04-01T17:31:00.000-05:00

... because my eyeballs have escaped my head. Here's why: Why bother to get dressed at all?

I Have to Say Something

2007-04-01T01:17:00.000-05:00

It's really been bothering me every time the case of Emmett Till has come up in the news that no one is speaking up about something else. The racist elements of this crime are horrifying, to be sure. But so are the elements of it which resulted in a 14-year-old boy (of any race) thinking it okay to sexually harass someone else simply because she was there, female, and thus "his" to harass. The same women-hating elements caused a handful of violent white bigots to believe it their duty to beat the life out of a 14-year-old child because that child dared to whistle at "their" woman. These men would have done the same thing to Emmett Till if he'd keyed their beat up old pickup truck because, for them, this situation was not about Till's race, but about what they believed to be their possession. There is no reason to think these same men would have hesitated to brutally murder a white man under the same circumstances. The severity of Till's injuries proves their interest was not a reasonable one of protecting the woman from further unwarranted and unwanted sexual harassment; rather, they were absolutely enraged and showing that they, and they alone, had complete control over her. Had either Till or the men who killed him had any respect for women (of any race), Till's life would not have been squandered that day.

Pssssst!

2007-03-02T03:35:00.000-06:00

I know a lot of people who visit The Needle's Bewitching Eye do so because they're looking for information related to Merry Cox. Well, I found out some very exciting news today -- and Merry is part of it!

I Got A Needlework Gig!

2007-02-28T17:31:00.000-06:00

I have some thrilling news I haven't had time to tell you until now:

I've been the Needlework Editor for Needlework News at CraftGossip.com for a month now. It's a lot of fun -- but keeping me very busy!

Please visit me there, too, and let me know your thoughts and ideas. The information I'll post on Needlework@CraftGossip.com will usually be different than what you'll find here. Although I'm sure there will continue to be some overlap, I think you'll notice a difference in my "voice" between the two places. My CraftGossip voice will be more excited and enthusiastic, as if we're shopping together in a wonderful LNS with lots of hard-to-find, out-of-print charts!

The Needle's Bewitching Eye will remain my personal blog. My voice will be more meditative and contemplative -- my "stitching voice." The majority of pictures of my finished stitching will be posted here, not on CraftGossip. Instead of posting an SBQ answer in both places, I will generally post my answer here; I may post it on CraftGossip (and not here) when the SBQ topic seems to fit in better content-wise over there. When I do post something to both sites in answer to an SBQ, it will be because I have different information to share in each place.

So please bookmark both; I think you'll find it worthwhile!

SBQ: About Chartpacks

2007-02-16T16:07:00.000-06:00

This week's Stitching Blogger's Question is:

Do you like to buy "chartpacks" that include charms, buttons, and/or beads or do you prefer to gather all materials yourself?

I definitely like the option of a chartpack, but most of the time, everything is automatically bundled with the chart -- which means I don't have a real choice regarding the chartpack. If everything is bundled together, then I have to buy the chartpack if I want the chart.

Since I am just as much a pattern collector as I am a stitcher, I would prefer to spend my money on materials when I am actually ready to start a project, rather than to have my funds tied up during the pattern-collecting phase. For this same reason, the more expensive the items in a chartpack are, the more I want to be able to purchase them separately from the chart.

At the same time, I really appreciate the convenience of chartpacks. It's wonderful to have all the materials you need -- especially hard to find items -- made easily available to you. I also like being able to buy a chartpack that includes enough specialty floss to stitch a design (and enough extra that I'm not going to run short if I make a mistake; this is very important for a chartpack's materials to be truly useful), rather than having to pay for an entire skein of specialty floss.

For instance, Just Nan and Victoria Sampler are two designers who offer chartpacks separately from their charts, and whose chartpacks are also of excellent value because they contain numerous specialty fibers, beads, charms, and so on. I collect patterns from both of these designers -- but I buy the chartpacks when I need them (and keep my eyes open for news of certain patterns going out of print so that I can decide whether or not to pick up the chartpack before that happens). Because I know I can get them separately, I choose not to buy Just Nan or Victoria Sampler patterns from shops who automatically bundle these designers' charts with their chartpacks. (In this case, it's the shop who loses some business from me because they are neglecting to recognize that it's my prerogative to dictate how and when I spend my money.)

All that said, when a chartpack is in the under $10 range, I will generally go ahead and buy it. It's been my experience with chartpacks of this dollar value that I'm getting the items in the chartpack for $4 or less, that the $4 or so I pay for those items is cheaper than what I would pay if I bought the items separately myself, and that the chart and chartpack are probably not available separately. So because I see these chartpacks as a good value even if I don't get around to stitching those designs for a while (or, ahem, ever), I go ahead and buy them ... but I'd still appreciate the choice to buy only the chart in many cases.

Hari-Kuyo Needle Festival

2007-02-09T12:41:00.000-06:00

This is such a beautiful needlework tradition that I had to share it with you! (It's also the first use I've come across for tofu, which I just don't care for, that I really like!)

Stitching Retreats (2/7/07 SBQ)

2007-02-07T22:43:00.000-06:00

Today's SBQ, suggested by Danielle, is about stitching retreats:

Have you ever been to a stitching retreat?

I've been to several. My first stitching retreats were Heart of Cross Stitch and then the Creative Arts and Textiles Show (CATS) in 2000; I attended both in Pennsylvania because at the time, I lived in New Jersey. Unfortunately, 2000 was the last year for Heart of Cross Stitch.

But CATS, whose name has been changed to the Consumer Arts and Teaching Show, is still running, although sadly they've reduced the numbers and locations of the shows offered down to just one this year. However, CATS offers the largest market open directly to stitchers anywhere in the US so is well worth attending just to shop. It will be held September 27 - 29, 2007 at the Hershey Lodge & Convention Center in Hershey, Pennsylvania. You'll find lots more information at the CATS website, which will be updated in the near future with 2007 information. Don't forget to sign up for their newsletter!

As mentioned in previous posts here on my blog, I've also attended other retreats/classes available through the Embroiderers' Guild of America (including opportunities to take classes with the most popular teaching-only designers such as Merry Cox and CA Wells) as well as online classes available through a number of different sources (Elegant Stitch, Swan Sampler Stitchers, Victoria Sampler, Just A Thought from Judy Odell).

Favorite (Hand-Dyed) Fabric (1/24/07 SBQ)

2007-02-03T02:40:00.000-06:00

This SBQ was suggested by Danielle:

What company produces your favorite hand-dyed fabric? Are there any
companies whose hand-dyed fabric you do not like? If so, why?

My favorite hand-dyed fabric is no longer available. I loved, LOVED, LOVED fabric from The Blended Needle owned by Michele and Bob Sayetta (now owners of Heaven and Earth Designs, but no longer dyeing fabric). After the Sayettas sold the business to Heaven Lee Creations, I had so many problems with the new company and new owners that I'll never buy from them again. I'm sure glad to have a nice stash of ORIGINAL The Blended Needle fabric, though!

Currently, I guess I'd have to say that my favorite hand-dyed fabric is from Silkweaver. They were, if not the first, then at least one of the first to hand-dye fabric, and in my opinion, they set the standards for this industry. They continuously meet and improve upon those standards, too -- I've always been impressed with their customer service, speed, and quality. I look forward to Silkweaver's Solo offerings each week; some of them are a bit obnoxious for my tastes, others are AMAZING (and almost always sold out immediately ... and now I'm enabling regarding Solos ... silly me), and all of them are really interesting to contemplate. Also, The Blended Needle actually spun off from Silkweaver ... So perhaps I'm biased, LOL.

To be fair, though, I haven't tried fabrics from any of the other manufacturers of hand-dyed fabric. More importantly, more than one color of fabric from each company I've seen is on my wish list!

Empty Spaces

2007-01-23T21:50:00.000-06:00

I miss you, loopy girl.

Winter Hand Care (SBQ from 10/11/06)

2007-01-20T22:06:00.001-06:00

Although I do have a few small stitching happy dances in for this year already, they are gifts I can't share with you just yet. <--- The current SBQ asks us to share any current happy dances for this year, but since I have to wait ... while it's still winter and might be helpful to someone, I'll answer an SBQ from last October regarding winter hand care (which was suggested by Lee, whose blog is Lake Stitcher).

As we all know, stitching in the winter can really be rough on the hands. What do you do to treat your hands well in the cold winter months? Do you have any suggestions for creams or soaps? Or perhaps a special regimen that you would like to share?

I've found that as I age, and probably due in part to effects of various health conditions and work environments, my skin has really changed over the past ten to fifteen years. Back in my mid-twenties, I swore by Gardener's Hand Repair, which is manufactured by Earth Therapeutics. I even used this as part of a regimen which eventually cured a very painful, extremely itchy, and exceedingly gross bout of psoriasis I endured for about nine months on the bottoms of my feet.

By my early thirties, though, the Gardener's Hand Repair just wasn't doing it for me anymore. By this time, I was working outdoors year-round for the United States Postal Service as both a substitute rural mail carrier and a city casual (which is basically a substitute city carrier). I usually managed to avoid sunburn, but wind burn was another story, especially during the colder months of the year. Additionally, fingerless gloves were a necessity for handling the mail, which meant my fingers were exposed to the absolute worst of the bitter winters. To top it all off, unless you spend your entire workday doing nothing else other than literally shuffling paper products like I was in this environment, you probably have no idea just how drying paper can be to one's skin. I tried everything I could find on the market at the time in an attempt to save my hands, but with very little luck. My hands didn't fully recover until I'd been away from that job for about a year.

Over the last year and a half or so, I've developed an entirely different skin care regimen which is working very well for me. For all my facial care needs, I use Bioelements products. For all over body care, I'll only use pure olive oil soap now (Olivia is one brand I like); this alone improved my dry hands and cuticles immensely. I also exfoliate my hands and cuticles once or twice a week as needed using OPI Skin Renewal Scrub. For hand lotion, I use A-Mantle (previously called Acid Mantle) by Doak Dermatologics. I also use A-Mantle immediately after shaving (legs and armpits) because it helps prevent itching. (And when I decided to use hair conditioner to replace the shaving cream I ran out of recently, I found my skin was even more soft and less itchy after shaving.)

Hungry?

2007-01-13T17:47:00.000-06:00

My stitching time at the moment is all focused on one thing, or set of things actually, which I hope to be able to post about in more detail and with pictures very soon. However, while working on that project yesterday, I sat stitching in front of my computer and watched this video. I feel compelled to share it with you. Although the video is about 90 minutes long, it is very interesting -- and, unfortunately, also very important. Warning: If you're at all like me, this video may make you hungry, but also at least a bit scared to eat.

My First SBQ = First 2007 SBQ

2007-01-11T06:15:00.000-06:00

I'm going to start answering the Stitching Blogger's Question (SBQ). It will give me something to write about in between posts containing stitching-related pictures. ;>) Also, it will give me an opportunity to experiment with using categories and/or labels. I think I will also plan to answer older SBQs at the rate of a couple a week; perhaps someone will find my answers useful or of interest along the way, as I have found many times while reading other stitchers' answers to the SBQs.

My first SBQ question is:

Do you dream of running your own LNS/ONS? If so, tell us about your dream. If not, tell us about your cross stitch dream… maybe you dream of designing, dyeing your own floss or fabric, etc.

Hmmm. No, I don't think I dream of running my own LNS. I dream often of having everything available within the worldwide stitching market at my immediate disposal, LOL, but I'm afraid the upkeep of a shop that would meet my wishes as a stitcher would be far more work (and likely much less stitching time than I manage to find now) than I'd want to deal with as an owner. I think I'd be quite happy working full time as an employee at my dream LNS, though!

I wouldn't mind being a designer, but I have little to no talent for designing, and I prefer to dream about things I might actually be able to achieve someday ...

Therefore, I suppose (at least one of) my cross stitch dream(s) would be having enough time to stitch that I start running out of wall space to hang finished projects. Such a time is a long way off, so this is a dream which gives me plenty of room to grow.

A Merry New Year

2007-01-02T01:48:00.000-06:00

Merry Cox, that is. I completed the stitching on my other optimistically dated project, the sampler from Merry Cox's A Diminutive Sewing Set (copyright 2005), very early the morning of January 2nd.

I'd been working on it for several hours on New Year's Day and wasn't willing to put it down until I finished it. So, my optimistic date is off by about 26 hours, which is okay with me even though the sampler just says 2006. Additionally, since my birthday occurs mid-year, this was technically stitched during both my 36th and 37th years of age, but you may notice I didn't bother making any correction or addition for that fact either.

In my opinion, neither of those two "errors" is nearly as annoying as how obvious this particular design makes it that I am truly lousy with centering lettering -- and even that doesn't bother me all that much on this piece because it's just too pretty not to love. ;>) Actually, I wasn't really trying all that hard to center the lettering because I was sort of winging things by stitching as I thought of something appropriate rather than truly planning ahead. If I were to restitch this piece, though, I would stitch the border first, which would have given me better guidance in terms of stitching the lettering. I stitched the border last because I was so eager to get right into the heart of the design.

Keeping in mind
my experience working in tent stitch on Birds & Berries, I chose to stitch the lettering on this piece in cross stitch instead of tent stitch. Both pieces use the same fiber for the text, Gloriana Winter Woods, and are stitched on the same fabric, Wichelt's 32 count sandstone linen, so you may find it interesting to compare the way the text looks different between the two.

I made several changes to this piece from the way Merry charted it. In some cases, my changes resulted from stitching errors on my part. For instance, I went with a simple back stitch border rather than the feathery border Merry designed because I didn't correctly determine where the left side needed to be, meaning I either had to frog or make a design change. I miscounted somewhere while stitching at least the stems and leaves (and perhaps the flowers, too, which I stitched first) in the bottom portion of the design; after that, I used the chart as a guide but stitched it such that things looked good to me.

I also made intentional changes. Where I have "Squirrels Nest Getaway," Merry had charted another slightly different alphabet; admittedly, I was a bit tired of stitching alphabets at that point, even in such a gorgeous color. At the bottom, I used my blog name as inspiration instead of stitching, "a gift for [insert name]" -- because I'm not letting this one out of my sight, LOL. I extended the sampler bands of specialty stitches to fill in space where Merry suggested putting one's initials, since the sampler would already have my full name on it.

I don't know why Blogger has made this picture so small, but if you'd like to see it bigger, just click on the picture.

Now to decide what to stitch next ...

DH's Gift

2006-12-24T14:35:00.000-06:00

Sunday was a somewhat sunny day, which allowed me to take pictures ... and we've done our gift opening now, so I can share what I made for DH with you (not that he reads this, LOL).

Merry Cox has several patterns for pocket watch samplers available on her website (under Kits and Charts). While I was taking classes with her in Indianapolis this year, I decided to buy the one called My Beloved, copyright 2006. I love the idea of wives making tiny samplers for their husbands pocket watches to bless them while they are away from home and remind them how much they are loved.

My DH isn't allowed to wear a watch (or any jewelry including his wedding ring) at work, which he really misses; however, he can carry things in the pockets of his pants. So this is a perfect gift for him. I picked My Beloved because I liked the colors in that kit best, and also because we used the wording "my beloved friend" to address each other in our wedding vows.

I made changes to the pattern to incorporate the wording from our vows and to commemorate this as a Yule gift. I like the way "good" works with both "friend" and "yule" in the finished product. I have no idea how I managed to get the lettering centered so nicely the first time, but I'm very happy about that as frogging over one stitching done on 40 count fabric certainly isn't any fun. ;>) The pictures show the stitching closeup, and then mounted inside the pocket watch.

I hope to have one more stitching finish to share with you before the end of the year, as I found another optimistically dated project from a June Merry Cox class -- and I do not intend to frog it, LOL.

I'm Scared of My Sewing Machine

2006-12-23T06:02:00.000-06:00

Back in February, I took several classes with Merry Cox through Lake Michigan Sampler Guild (LMSG). Although those were the first and only classes I have taken through LMSG, they definitely will not be my last. I am so thrilled to have a guild which offers such great programming within a few hours of me!

They were my first classes with Merry Cox, too, and I liked her so much I took classes with her two more times during the year (in Cincinnati and in Indianapolis). She is a wonderful teacher and designer, and a delightful person, too.

Like many of Merry's classes, the class for this particular project was intended as a finishing class. Although I had worked on pre-stitching the piece, most of Merry's designs involve a LOT of stitching -- and most of that is over one -- so I just didn't have it done in time. Thankfully, her instructions are fabulous, so once I get up the nerve to face my sewing machine, I think I'll do just fine. In the meantime, I worked on this project on and off throughout the year and enjoyed every stitch. I just finished the stitching early this morning because I had optimistically put "2006" on it way back in February, and with it's pretty yuletide colors, it was really nice to work on again at this time of year.

So, this is my version of Merry Cox's Birds & Berries Sewing Case, copyright 2003. Merry encourages stitchers to modify designs in order to personalize them, and one of the benefits for me in not having my stitching completed prior to class was being able to see what ideas other stitchers had come up with to modify this project. As I so often do, I made a number of mistakes while stitching this design, one of which was a counting error when I stitched the first (right-hand) bird on the front of the sewing case. I didn't notice my error until I was finished stitching the bird and trying to figure out why it didn't look like Merry's.

The bird, being stitched over two, could have easily been frogged and restitched as charted, but it occurred to me that it's head looked like that of a cardinal. I spent most of my middle school and high school years in St. Louis, Missouri and was, therefore, a Cardinals baseball fan, so I decided to use my stitching mistake to purposely personalize my sewing case. Since the first bird is clearly a female cardinal based on her coloring, I used the deep red thread Merry uses for the berries to stitch a male cardinal, too. I think he's quite handsome and am very proud of myself for coming up with such a good result out of a stitching mistake. ;>)

Below is a closeup of the front of my sewing case, and if you'd like to compare, you can see a closeup of how Merry stitched the front of her sewing case here.

I only used Merry's chart for the branches, leaves, and berries as a general guide while stitching mine. After deciding not to stitch the branches so they hang all the way down to the ground, as Merry did, I filled in leaves and berries until I was happy with the way everything looked.

Here is a closeup of the back of my sewing case. Another stitcher in the class had done full cross stitches for all of her stitching, while Merry's chart calls for tent stitch for most of the over one stitching and I had followed Merry's direction. After seeing the other stitcher's work, I wished I had done full cross stitches also. I probably would have gone back and made full cross stitches -- at least for all the lettering -- if I hadn't already done so much of the lettering in a strongly variegated thread.

However, Merry told us one of the reasons she uses tent stitch is because when she studies antique samplers and other stitching, she notices there has been a lot of thread loss; the tent stitches definitely do mimic the way an antique piece with thread loss looks. You can see the effect Merry is trying to create especially well in the sampler-style alphabet on the back of the sewing case. This alphabet is stitched in Gloriana Winter Woods, a variegated thread whose colors sometimes almost disappear on this particular fabric.

Learning Merry's reasoning behind her use of tent stitch makes me glad I used it, too, at least on this one piece. (Well, I will stick with tent stitch for the rest of the Birds & Berries set so they match each other.) However, in the future, I will probably do full cross stitches on Merry's designs, especially since Merry confirmed she includes plenty of thread in her kits so that I can do this if I wish.

The text as charted for the back of the sewing case was, "Wrought this ___ day of (month) (year)," but since I'd already put "2006" on the front, and since the stitching took well over a day, I stole another class student's idea to commemmorate that I'd taken this as a class through LMSG.

Here is a picture of the holder for the needle pages. I changed the color of the thread for the herringbone stitches from the same blue used in the nun stitches to the color used in the vase on the front of the case just for variety.

And here is what will be a little pocket inside the sewing case. I made this cardinal another male, changed the herringbone stitch color for variety again, and stitched a tiny little "39" because I thought this looked like a postage stamp. Now I will always have something to remind me what it cost to send a first class letter in the US in 2006!

Now, I just have to work up the courage to approach my sewing machine to finish this project into the actual sewing case. I titled this post as I did for a reason -- I need support, LOL. I had a run-in with a sewing machine in Home Economics in 5th grade that scarred me for life -- mentally, at least, LOL. I originally bought my sewing machine to zigzag the edges of my cross stitch fabric, but have barely used it even for that. (I also had some thoughts that I would start doing small machine quilting projects -- mostly things I could then embroider on, i.e., crazy quilting.) Instead, I tend to reach for Fray Check. It's been so long I'll have to pull out the directions for my sewing machine just to thread it and wind a bobbin, and I'll be crossing my fingers while the bobbin winds that I'm doing it correctly and don't screw up the machine terribly. All I have to do (I think) is sew a few straight lines -- albeit on really expensive silk, ha ha.

On the other hand, I took this class, so I know I can do this. While I haven't had enough practice with a sewing machine to feel confident I can sew in a straight line with it, I know I have plenty of inexpensive fabric with which I can practice. At least until I try, I refuse to pay a finisher to do this when I have such excellent instructions to work with and all the supplies I need (well, okay, I'll probably have to go shopping for thread that matches ... but it's not like I don't have a sewing machine).

Plus, I am fortunate to have a really wonderful finisher among my friends, and she's so good she can probably undo almost anything bad I could do to this project while trying to finish it myself. If that's not a confidence booster, I don't know what is.

It will be a little while, though. With the inspiration of wanting to see this lovely project finished into a little sewing case, I could get up the courage to at least try fairly quickly ... but it will take some time before I can clear out my craft area enough to be able to set up my sewing machine in order to start, especially as I'm still dealing with a back injury.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the pictures of this one so far, and I hope to bring a finished product to you sometime before, say, spring. ;>)

Yule Project

2006-12-22T06:46:00.000-06:00

My husband's gift is done, but I need a day with good light to take a picture of it before I can share it with you.

Wanting to stitch rather than work on finishing Brightneedle's Lady's Collection yesterday, I started and completed a fun little project: The Orange Brew Bag, copyright 2006, from Shepherd's Bush. This came as a kit with the already made burlap bag, which was somewhat difficult to stitch on because it's rather small, making it difficult to get my hand inside. I'm usually a stab stitcher, but I quickly gave up stabbing on this project and sewed instead. Texture-wise, the burlap wasn't all that pleasurable to stitch on, though it reminded me of an early stitching project I did in grade school on similar fabric. I tied the moon button on by making a bow from two of the threads that came in the kit and like the effect; I'll have to use this technique again.

I'm not sure if or how I'll use this bag, as it's not very big. I had something in mind for it, but it's too small, so for now, I'll just admire it. ;>)

Finished Stitching At Last ...

2006-12-19T04:01:00.000-06:00

Yes, that's right, I've finished all the stitching for Brightneedle's Lady's Collection. Here are the needle pages.

First, the little periwinkle bunny with pinkeye is back, and he's eating the flowers! This is my favorite piece in this project because I love the humor in it.

The thread color used for the numbers is different than what was used previously in the chart -- I wonder why ... I was surprised this very pale green color shows up as well as it does.

I'm very happy with how the buttonhole stitches, which are the darker spots at the top and bottom of each needle page, turned out.

I'm curious to see how easily (I'm feeling optimistic now that the stitching is done) this project will go together during the finishing process, but I won't be getting to that right away. Next up is DH's Yule gift, which I've obviously left until almost the last minute, but fortunately it should be a very quick stitch (just wait ... you'll see! ;>). I hope to get back to this project and get it finished before the end of the year.

Almost Done!

2006-12-19T03:49:00.000-06:00

Finally, you can see some of the yellow in the scissor case pieces of Brightneedle's Lady's Collection! (The shadow stitching you can see behind is because I folded the material to get this onto the scanner, and there's a stitched piece folded right behind this one.)

There are a lot of different colors in the little pin cushions, which don't show up well ... I still wonder why the designers did things the way they did. (Same deal going on with the shadow stitching.)

And more yellow:

Another Project Framed ...

2006-12-18T01:44:00.001-06:00

There is more progress on Brightneedle's Lady's Collection; in fact, I'm almost done with the stitching. I was sidelined for a few weeks by a nasty cold and then a pulled muscle in my back, but I'm back to stitching again.

However, what I want to share with you at the moment are these little guys:

This is Black Sheep, copyright 2002, by Joy of the Needle. I stitched it using the three (yep, just three!) DMC threads called for in the chart on 28 count China Pearl Jobelan from Wichelt.

I actually stitched this while on pain killers post-surgery a year ago with the intention of it being a gift for someone last Christmas. Then I wasn't really up to framing it, and wasn't allowed to drive to go frame shopping for a while anyway, so it will be a gift this year.

I just love the frame, and it even came with the mats. The colors went perfectly with the thread colors used in the design. I'm really happy with the way it turned out, although I discovered while trying to center the stitching in the frame that I had apparently cut one of my fingers on the glass ... I rushed to get it into the frame without leaving any telltale bloodstains, LOL. As a result, it's not as well centered as I'd like, but that fits the design, and so I've left it this way.

I NEED Some of These!!!

2006-11-20T20:00:00.000-06:00

If I had any artistic or designing talent of my own, I'd make something like the T-shirts available from Dancing Violet Designs' Cafe Press Site.

But I have no artistic or designing talent of my own, which is why I'm a stitcher and not a designer, so instead, I'm going to buy some of Dancing Violet's awesome cross stitch-related T-shirts.

Maybe you'll see something you like, too?

Increasingly Annoyed

2006-11-19T21:38:00.000-06:00

I'm continuing to work on Brightneedle's Lady's Collection. Unfortunately, the more I stitch on this, the more I seem to be finding to complain about, and although I'm sure I'll appreciate the finished project, I think I'll be most happy to be finished with it.

I'm increasingly disappointed with Brightneedle's color choices. So far, everywhere it's been charted that I use yellow in this project, it's too pale to really show up in the finished stitching. Where you can see yellow in the scans, you see it better in the scan than in person ... and you don't see it at all in some areas, even in scans. Overall, I think several of these color choices, when stitched in close proximity to each other, tend to make the piece look washed out, at best, or dirty, at worst.

Here are the next two pieces of this project. On the first one, I ended up off center with "Needles" by two threads, and then purposely put "26" off center to make it less noticeable. (So, why am I telling you? LOL ... ) Also, there' a big linen slub right in the center of the round part of the "6," which annoys me.

On the next one, the "28" is a thread or two higher than it should be because I goofed while stitching the "2" but didn't notice it until I was halfway through the "8." I only ripped out the "2," though, and stitched it again as charted but slightly up of where it should be so that it would go properly with the "8." And I noticed that the green silk didn't stitch smoothly in the "N" -- see how it looks sort of blurry compared with the "N" in the 26 piece above? Some of that is the fault of the linen because the thread between the left and right side of the "N" was extremely thin, but I'm still unhappy these NPI silks seem so inconsistent. (Especially when their price is about to go up per skein from $2.70 to $3.70! Sorry, but I just don't see the quality I require to justify even their current price compared to other silk brands -- or cotton brands, for that matter.)

You may have noticed I'm suddenly complaining about the linen in this kit. I don't know anything about it, other than that it is supposed to be 32 count, as no information was included about it in the kit other than regarding the count. I also don't know whether it was Brightneedle or Elegant Stitch who kitted this project. However, I definitely know I'm not impressed with this linen. There's even an area, which fortunately ended up falling between two stitched pieces (instead of inside one where it would have significantly messed with my stitching), where three horizontal threads merge into one -- and stay that way.

On top of it all, this linen is cut too small for my preference. I've been using an 8-inch Q-snap, and as anyone who uses any size Q-snap knows, you need more than an inch of fabric available to wrap around it. There's not enough for that here, so I'll have to resort to a hoop or stitch in hand for the rest of the pieces (and I'm going to have to turn my fabric the other way to fit them all on, which could make things a bit difficult when it comes time to do the finishing work). I'm not going with the option of using another piece of fabric because I don't feel like dealing with the hassle of finding fabric that matches this one well enough, and I'm certainly not going to ask for another piece of this rather crappy linen.

I wonder if today's complaints were affected at all by the fact that I was watching Hacking Democracy while stitching? I jokingly described this very important documentary to a friend as a horror movie because it certainly is horrifying, and that's regardless of your political persuasion. I would highly recommend this very interesting documentary movie to all Americans. I now understand much better what I should be looking and fighting for in order to achieve a voting system in which my vote is truly secure and actually counted.

I hope you are enjoying whatever you're stitching on right now a lot more than I'm enjoying this project!

This Bunny Needs Colored Contacts

2006-11-16T21:50:00.000-06:00

I've got progress to report on Brightneedle's Lady's Collection with completion of the next two parts.

Stitching my initials went 66% smoothly ... I had to restitch my middle initial because it wasn't centered between the other two. But a 66% success rate centering lettering correctly the first time is a definite improvement for me!

I'm still not thrilled with Brightneedle's color choices for this design. I really like the periwinkle bunny, but why does it have "pinkeye"?

Can You Identify the Designer?

2006-11-14T03:41:00.000-06:00

I've been admiring a mermaid pattern on eBay for some time. However, the eBay sellers who are selling this mermaid kit are located in Asia and routinely sell kits they've put together which I know are copyright violations. The copyrights belong to Mirabilia, Lavender & Lace, etc., and at this point, the kits I've seen this eBay seller put up for auction have been items that have never been legally available as kits. So I highly suspect the mermaid kit I like is also a copyright violation.

What's more, I have written to the eBay seller to ask who the designer is. The eBay seller claimed it is a Mirabilia pattern. The fact that this mermaid is definitely NOT a Mirabilia design is another strong indication that this mermaid kit violates copyright law.

I want to know who the designer is so I can buy the pattern legally and support that designer, but I have no idea who the designer actually is. Also, I want to be able to kit the pattern myself, so that I know I can trust the materials, rather than buying what may very well be shoddy materials and an almost certainly illegally copied chart through a rip-off artist who charges ridiculous amounts for shipping and whose eBay ID changes regularly -- probably due to being shut down by eBay for selling shoddy kits which violate copyright.

Therefore, I'm asking for your help. If anyone knows the designer of this mermaid or where I can purchase it, I'd very much appreciate the information. And please feel free to ask anyone you know who might know who the designer is to check out this post as well. Thank you in advance for any help you can offer.

Current WIP

2006-11-13T08:08:00.001-06:00

I am currently working on Brightneedle's Lady's Collection, which I got through Elegant Stitch earlier this year. I didn't make even one stitch in it before or during class, but I loved the design so knew I'd get to it.

Now that I've finished stitching two of the pieces, I'm sadly not quite as taken with it. I still love the design, but I'm not really enthused with the color choices and especially with the way Brightneedle chose to mix some of the colors together in the design. Makes me wish I'd gotten the chart second-hand and kitted it myself, though I suspect I would have kitted it as called for in the chart and then figured out I didn't like the colors the same way I have now.

In any case, here's the first part. I really don't like the mix of two different greens in the little girls dress -- and they're similar enough to each other that rather than seeing little dots of a different green within the other, it looks like her dress is stained. There is a lot more pink in this design than I had realized, too, and I'm not normally a huge fan of pink. I actually do like these pink shades, but definitely NOT with the lighter green shades in the design. As a teenager in the preppy eighties, I got tired of pink and green together a long time ago. But the main thing I dislike about the lighter shades of green in this design is that they look like ... flourescent snot. Perhaps, since I list green as one of my favorite colors, I'm just too picky.

I'm also finding I'm not thrilled with NPI threads either. This is the first time I've stitched an entire project with them, and I'm not liking the way they lay on the fabric. Sometimes, the stitches look bunched together, and other times they lay neater. The color doesn't seem to make a difference, as sometimes the color lays nicely in one area but not in another. I figured it must be something I was doing, but even when I'm very careful to let my needle dangle and unwind every few stitches, it's not preventing the bunching -- and when I don't pay as much attention, the threads might lay just the way I want. Maybe it's the fact that this project is all over one, but I haven't had the same problem with silks of other brands even when I'm stitching over one. Hmmm.

Here is the second part. There are numerous errors in this one, but I decided not to frog and restitch. That's partly because frogging over one stitching is such a pain, partly because this project was kitted with a minimum of floss to begin with, and partly because I'm no longer as happy with the project as a whole. Plus, I resort to my usual excuse that any mistakes make the work mine. I frequently try to make a mistake work in a design instead of ripping it out; this design is no exception to that rule of mine, LOL.

This project is stitching up much more quickly than I thought it would, though. The above two parts are the most stitching-intensive. The rest of the parts may start to bore me, as they are rather repetitive. Hopefully, the fact that there isn't much stitching on each one will help me get this done quicker, as I'm already eagerly looking forward to stitching something else, LOL.

Two Previous Finishes Framed

2006-11-11T01:24:00.001-06:00

Since I had my iron and other finishing supplies out from working on finishing My Workstation, I decided it was time to frame two earlier finishes from this year. I'm far from being a professional framer, but professional framing is so expensive (and I'd rather spend my crafting money on stash!), so I frame whatever I can myself. I'm really happy with how these two turned out.

The first is something I stitched for my brother, who is a non-smoker and very vehement about his dislike for smoking. Our parents (with whom I no longer have any contact because they couldn't be bothered to come to my wedding) are smokers, so seeing this stitched and hanging in his house will probably tick them off to no end, but I stitched it out of respect for my brother's feelings on the issue, as I am a smoker, too. (I'd really like to quit, but my husband smokes, and anyone who has ever lived with a smoker knows how difficult that can be. Trying to live with and sleep next to someone who smokes and does not want to quit when you really do want to quit is probably more difficult. One of these days, I think I will give it up for good anyway, but I am not quite there yet. However, being a stitcher is great encouragement -- the more I stitch, the less I feel any desire to smoke because my hands are already busy.)

Anyway, here it is. It's from a Dimensions Sunset Jiffy kit, "Don't Think About It" #16723, copyright 2001, which I found on eBay some time ago at a great price. I stitched it using the 14 count aida and floss included in the kit and wish I had switched the fabric out to evenweave or linen. I really dislike stitching on aida after trying other fabrics (95% or more of my UFOs are such because they are started on aida from before I discovered evenweave and linen). I have several friends who stitch almost exclusively on aida that I should automatically mail any aida I end up with to, but when I started stitching this, I just went with what was included in the kit rather than looking for another substitute. However, I'm quite happy with the way the entire thing turned out. The pre-cut mats were things I had on hand that I thought worked perfectly with this design. I also had the frame on hand, but it was too big to show up when I put this on my scanner; imagine just a simple wood frame.

The second piece I framed is a NeedleMagic, Inc. kit, #3179 Mermaid, on which I don't see a copyright date. I did switch out the aida in this kit for a piece of very pale green evenweave I had in my stash, but stitched it with the threads included in the kit (which are about the size of #12 perle cotton). These threads weren't all that nice to work with, although I like the effect now that this project is finished. I found the frame at Hobby Lobby and bought several during a half-price sale because I liked them so much. I thought it would be perfect for a mermaid with the little pearls around the edge. Somewhere, I have another tiny mermaid project to stitch, and I'm fairly certain she'll fit into one of these same frames.

One secret I've learned for framing is to use a piece of light-weight iron-on interfacing on the back of my pieces first. This helps me get the piece squared off straightly, and often adds just the amount of padding I want so I don't need to use thicker foam board (which is often so difficult to fit into a frame); I can, of course, use thicker interfacing if I want more padding. Once I get the interfacing cut exactly the way I want it, I work with it on the back of the piece until it's ironed on exactly how I want it. Then, it's easier for me to tell when things are correctly centered on foam board/poster board, and within the mat(s)/frame. Also, if the fabric I used for stitching is smaller than needed for lacing, the interfacing holds the stitching in place and allows me to "cheat." Neither of the pieces I'm showing you here is laced because the fabric wasn't big enough to begin with; instead, I cut both of them to fit my (sticky on one side) poster board backing exactly. I've heard criticisms about the sticky stuff, but haven't had any problems myself; your mileage may vary of course. I do stick with acid-free materials as much as I can, and I use the sticky side to wrap the edges of my fabric around vs. putting it on the back of the piece whenever I can (i.e., when the fabric is big enough). And when I don't have enough fabric to work with, as in these two pieces, I hope the interfacing will help protect my stitching. I'm also not concerned with most of my stitching outlasting me -- I stitch for the pleasure stitching gives me in the present and frame things so they should hold up well during my lifetime. If they last longer than that, great, and if I ever stitch something I really want to last longer than I will, I'll probably handle it differently, but so far, these methods are working for me.

The Finish!

2006-11-09T21:02:00.001-06:00

I updated the picture which was originally here with a better one, which I took of My Workstation while it was on display during the 2007 National Counted Cross Stitch Show (NCCSS) competition. Interestingly, this piece received both my highest score (from Betsy Evans), as well as my lowest score (from infamous pottymouth Eileen Bennett). The difference in scoring was LARGE, and specifically based on the workmanship of my stitches, which is what makes it so very strange. You WILL see further discussion about this on INDEPENDENT NEEDLEWORK NEWS at a later date; right now, I am still working on my research for that post.

Today was a beautiful, sunny, and warm day here. I took advantage of the good light to take some better pictures, so now I can share my finished Workstation with you.

Here's a good picture showing the largest hedebo loop I've ever made, LOL -- the ribbon from the base goes through the hedebo loop and is then tied in a bow to keep the Workstation closed.

Here's a side view of it closed ... You won't get a back view because I managed to glue my hinge on a bit crooked. ;>) Perhaps someday when I locate my glue gun, I might fix that part (which would also keep the base more securely attached than I think it is right now).

This is the Workstation opened halfway, with the pin cushion removed. My pin cushion is a bit lumpier than I would like, but that is one of the things that makes it mine!

Next is a closeup of the hedebo loop used to keep the needlebook closed.

Here is a closer look at the needle pages -- already in use, too!

And last, but not least, a picture of the Workstation opened all the way.

This truly was a joy to stitch! The finishing was much easier than I had thought it would be; Judy's instructions made me feel like I could do anything I set my mind to, and the other stitchers in the class were an invaluable resource, too. I am thoroughly looking forward to finding out what Judy's next class offering will be!

Minor Happy Dance

2006-11-08T01:26:00.000-06:00

I finished all the stitching for Judy O'Dell's My Treasures Workstation, though not quite in time to really work along with the other stitchers who were finishing their Workstations over this past weekend. Instead, I was lucky enough to be about two days behind them, which meant I got extra clues on what to do and how to do it from them. Thanks to following in their expert footsteps and Judy's wonderful instructions and encouragement, I managed to do all of my finishing (except the pin cushion, which I did the night before to practice the joining stitch Judy used in this project) on Monday. But more on that later.

The hinge was the quickest part of this project for me to stitch, partly because I made no changes to the charted hinge.

I'm feeling a bit conflicted about my needle pages. During the finishing, I put the smaller (top) one on my Workstation upside down from how the instructions called for it to be (I hadn't realized until my needle pages were already attached that the top one was supposed to go on a different way ... which would have created the image of a square with the top half of the square on the top needle page and the bottom part of the square on the bottom needlepage). Once I figured out my mistake, I wished I had put a row of rhodes butterflies across the top of the smaller needle page to make it look like I did it "wrong" on purpose. In fact, I did consider adding butterflies to the needle pages but figured it would be too heavy of a stitch on my somewhat flimsy fabric, especially for pieces that were going to be loose on three sides. Had I stitched the butterflies across what is my top of the smaller needle page (both needle pages are pictured here upside down from how I put them onto my workstation, so imagine butterflies straight across from the flowers in the blank area, and you'll know where I now wish I had put butterflies), they would have been close enough to where the needle pages attach to the Workstation that they wouldn't have been too heavy ... oh well, I'm certainly not taking it apart now! Actually, I am quite happy with having done it differently than the instructions called for, just because that is another part that makes it uniquely mine ... but I still feel conflicted because I could have made it even more mine. ;>) So, my needle pages are stitched almost as charted (I reduced the size of the four sided stitches around the border to make the finished needle pages look daintier), but the smaller one is installed "wrong." LOL.

And here are the top and bottom of the pin cushion, which would be identical were it not for the variegated thread. I replaced cross stitches with the closed herringbone and rhodes butterflies on these.

The base was the hardest part for me because it involved centering lettering, which, as I mentioned previously, is not one of my strong suits. I did the math, but incorrectly, as I originally intended to include my middle initial until I found while stitching that it wouldn't fit. Then I still had to edit the last letter from the way it was charted; otherwise, I would have had to rip out my last name. (How fortunate I am that my last name is only three letters long! Otherwise, I would have had to center lettering on two different lines, LOL.) However, I am happy with the result, and also happy I was able to center lettering without having to rip it out more than once (I didn't determine that the middle initial was too much until after I had already stitched it) -- I think that is a first for me. The lone rhodes butterfly is my addition to this chart; I thought about doing a few more, but this was the last piece I stitched and I was eager to start the finishing process. (I managed to get the butterfly centered on the first try again. One thing I love about stitching is that I constantly amaze myself, LOL. Woohoo ... I can count! Sometimes, anyway ... )

I'll show you my finished Workstation in my next post. I do have pictures of it already, but am hoping for a less dreary day to try taking better ones. ;>)

Moving Right Along

2006-10-30T02:04:00.000-06:00

Here is the needlebook outside from Judy O'Dell's My Treasures Workstation. Again, I've replaced cross stitches with closed herringbone and rhodes butterflies.

I'm starting to get bored working only with this fiber, beautiful as it is. However, the finishing class for this project is next weekend, so I'm going to keep going with the stitching!

Next Part of My Workstation

2006-10-28T17:56:00.000-05:00

I completed the second part of Judy O'Dell's My Treasures Workstation, which is the inside of the needlebook.

I again switched some cross stitches to closed herringbone, and added rhodes butterflies into empty spaces.

I'm keeping this picture small at Judy's request. I'd love it if you find these pictures attractive enough to contact Judy about taking the class yourself!

By the way, I neglected to mention earlier that I'm stitching this project on Zweigart's 32 count cream Belfast.

A Partial Finish

2006-10-24T04:19:00.000-05:00

Among other things, I've been working on a class project, Judy O'Dell's My Treasures Workstation.

Although the chart calls for more, I'm using only one thread color (Needle Necessities overdyed floss 183-Jewel of the Nile) and letting its variegation make all the color changes.

The chart calls for only cross stitch, but Judy encouraged us students to make stitching changes, so I elected to use closed herringbone and butterfly rhodes stitches in mine. I'm a butterfly fan and thought butterflies would enjoy the pretty flowers in the original design. I'm particularly pleased with myself that I managed to get the butterflies centered on my first try, as centering is not my forte (perhaps my lack of centering ability is reserved for lettering, LOL).

I finished the top panel tonight:

Now onto the rest of the parts of this lovely design ... I need help from the stitching fairy to get this all completed in time for the finishing part of the class the first weekend in November!

Bookmark-worthy, even

2006-08-28T06:53:00.000-05:00

Thank you to everyone who took a look at the box I made for my sister-in-law, and for all the nice comments and compliments, too. I am so pleased you thought my adventure with this little box was not only blog-worthy but also bookmark-worthy, but I'm also just a bit nervous about that. After all, I've been reading and inspired by your blogs for some time now and thinking, "Wow, I wish I could do that!" Now I've gone and set expectations in your minds that I'll have something worth your time to review in the future, while I'm still kind of amazed that I managed to put something this neat together all by myself.

Well, I've got the pictures to prove it wasn't a fluke and am ready to move on to my next project, so today, the box will go into the mail on its way to my SIL in Florida. However, before I packaged it up, I scanned a picture of the bracelet because a few of you said you'd like to see it. Isn't it lovely?

Blog-worthy

2006-08-24T17:21:00.001-05:00

I read and very much enjoy so many different stitching blogs, but I hadn't gotten into blogging myself ... until now ... I finally have something I think is worth sharing through such a forum. I'm just so tickled with myself, LOL ...

My brother made a silver bracelet for me years ago in a summer school art class during high school (or maybe even junior high). Unfortunately, possibly due to my personal hormonal changes (hot flashes started at age 26, but so far none of my doctors have thought it important to look into -- and here I am just turned 37 and sweating-like-I'm-in-the-shower ten or more times a day plus the night sweats), I haven't been able to wear silver for years because it tarnishes when I do. Plus, my hands have grown to the point that I cannot get this lovely bracelet over my knuckles anyway. My brother just got married in June, and for his wife's birthday, I decided to give her the bracelet (with his permission) so it can be appreciated. I consider myself to have been only its temporary guardian. But I needed a pretty box of some kind for it.

So I picked up a paper mache box at Hobby Lobby. I planned to paint it, but that didn't really work out well. The paint was supposed to be a metallic red (red is her favorite color), but it came out flat, and even has a fog-like tinge in places. (I think the problem is that I was supposed to use a particular base coat, but I did not read the instructions that carefully until after I'd sprayed three light coats of paint. By then, I wasn't about to go find the proper basecoat.)

Hmmm. The fog-like tinge made it look old-fashioned to me ... So I ran with that idea and now have something reminiscent of a Victorian trinket box. I stitched her first initial (using a 1998 Framecraft Handbag Mirror and Pouchette pattern called K104 Initials designed by Christine-Ann Martin, my own choice of DMC threads along with Needle Necessities overdyed floss 1931~Calypso, and 18 count black davosa) and then set about trying to finish this little box similarly to Judy O'Dell's instructions for finishing tins.

I had to finagle several things because the box is round, because the davosa is a bit thicker than linen, because I couldn't find my glue gun, because I didn't have any batting, because I didn't want to make (or buy) cording (which I wasn't sure would work with the little gap I had between the stitched top and the top of the box itself anyway), and because the box is over two inches deep.

I used Aleene's Original Tacky Glue for everything, stuffed the stitched parts with Poly-Fil, laced the stitching for the top of the box to make it as compact as possible, whip-stitched the stitched top to the lining fabric (after gluing the lining fabric on), then whip-stitched the red lace around as trim. The lining fabric was something I've had for several years which I thought worked really nicely with the stitching, the not quite metallic red, the original flowery pattern on the paper mache box, and the red lace. The red lace was something I've had for many more years, perhaps even handed down from my grandma's sewing box!

The only part I'm not completely happy with is the lining fabric on the inside of the box. As you can see in the pictures, it puckered a little bit, although the pictures make it look worse than it actually is. However, for my first attempt at something like this, I think it turned out really, really well.

I've only once ever done anything with my stitching other than frame it in some way (or leave it to be framed or otherwise finished later, LOL), so this is a really big deal for me!

Now I have to make one for myself, ha ha!